Roommate Wants Payment for Watching My Kids - AITA?

"Roommate demands pay for babysitting kids, but lives rent-free and uses OP's car - AITA for refusing?"

Damjan

Published in Interesting
24 Dec 2025

Roommate Wants Payment for Watching My Kids - AITA?

In the world of shared living spaces, the dynamics between roommates can often become complicated, especially when unspoken expectations and emotional ties come into play. A recent Reddit thread has sparked a lively debate about a situation in which a 27-year-old woman finds herself at odds with her roommate over a seemingly simple request.

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As a mother of four, she turned to her roommate for help in watching her children for a few hours, only to be met with an unexpected demand for payment. This roommate, who moved in to support her after her husband's passing, has contributed little to household expenses and has also expressed romantic feelings that complicate their living arrangement.

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The crux of the discussion is whether it is reasonable for someone living rent-free to expect payment for watching the kids under an informal agreement. On the one hand, many argue that the roommate's request is out of line with the initial understanding. In contrast, others say that fairness in compensation is essential, regardless of past arrangements.

As the thread unfolds, users weigh in on the nuances of this complex situation. Is it fair for the roommate to request payment, or is it a reflection of deeper issues in their relationship?

Join the conversation as we explore the perspectives and insights shared by the Reddit community.

Original Post

So I'm (27F) planning on going out for a few hours the evening of March 4th. I have 4 children, I asked my roommate if he would be okay with watching them.

I'd be putting my younger two to bed before I leave that night and my older two are self sufficient so he'd be just making sure everyone is safe for a few hours. Here's where I may be the a*****e.

He wants me to pay him $20 an hour to watch them. He doesn't pay any rent, utilities, uses my car daily and just overall doesn't contribute to living expenses.

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Now he is a bit upset that I'm going to an event that he "wants us to go to together." But as i said two of my kids will be in bed and the other two would be not long after. So for most of the night he'd be hanging out while the kids are sleeping.

AITA for not wanting to pay him? Edit to add: My roomate moved in with me in December.

He moved in specifically to help me with my kids since my husband passed a way a few months prior. I did tell him not to worry about any rent until he was able to find a job.

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He has confessed he has feelings for me, but we talked about it and he is aware that I am not interested and he has respected my boundaries on that. Also, some have asked if we have slept together or been romantic.

No, we have not, nor will we be. And yes he is aware of that.

I spoke with him just a few moments ago, he is planning to move out in the coming weeks. He did admit it was upsetting as this didn't go the way he had hoped.

Thanks everyone for the input and help