Manager Admits To Publicly Shaming Autistic Employee To Improve Behavior, Questions Morality Of His Actions

"I've started publicly being mean to him when he does something wrong."

A gas station manager basically confessed to using public humiliation as a “behavior fix,” and it is not landing as a cute workplace trick. The post is messy, because he is not just dealing with a difficult employee, he is dealing with an autistic worker who already has a rough time in that environment.

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OP runs paperwork and tasks, but the authority situation is weird, and the employee, J, is a distant relative of OP’s boss. J was hired for family reasons, and the boss refuses to fire him unless he commits something serious, so OP is stuck working with him again and again for months while things quietly rot.

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Then OP snaps, starts calling J out publicly, and the “improvements” raise an even bigger question: was the behavior actually fixed, or did everyone just get better at surviving the manager?

OP, a gas station manager, handles paperwork and tasks with limited authority over employees.

OP, a gas station manager, handles paperwork and tasks with limited authority over employees.Reddit
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An employee, J, has low-functioning autism/ADHD and was hired because he is a distant relative of OP's boss.

An employee, J, has low-functioning autism/ADHD and was hired because he is a distant relative of OP's boss.Reddit
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The recent admission by a gas station manager about publicly shaming an autistic employee to modify behavior raises significant ethical concerns. This approach not only undermines the dignity of the individual but also risks damaging team morale and mental health. Public shaming is known to have long-lasting negative effects, which can create a toxic workplace atmosphere. The manager's actions indicate a troubling gap in understanding effective behavior modification strategies, particularly when working with neurodiverse individuals. Recognizing the ethical implications of such tactics is vital for cultivating a respectful and supportive environment for all employees.

He's a nightmare to work with, but the boss won't fire him unless he commits a serious offense.

He's a nightmare to work with, but the boss won't fire him unless he commits a serious offense.Reddit

Despite requesting otherwise, OP still works with him frequently, and no issues have been resolved after 7 months.

Despite requesting otherwise, OP still works with him frequently, and no issues have been resolved after 7 months.Reddit

OP admits J is a nightmare to work with, but the boss’s “won’t fire him unless it’s a serious offense” rule keeps the problem alive.

Studies published in the Journal of Applied Psychology show that public shaming can lead to increased anxiety and decreased job performance among employees.

Effective behavior management should focus on constructive feedback rather than punitive measures.

Encouraging a culture of support and growth can enhance overall workplace well-being.

OP's patience ran out, so they publicly reprimanded him for mistakes, which surprisingly improved his behavior somewhat.

OP's patience ran out, so they publicly reprimanded him for mistakes, which surprisingly improved his behavior somewhat.Reddit

OP called out J for flirting and making a woman uncomfortable, directing him to focus on assigned tasks.

OP called out J for flirting and making a woman uncomfortable, directing him to focus on assigned tasks.Reddit

Promoting Positive Behavior Change in the Workplace

Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool for promoting behavior change in organizational settings.

OP then called out J for neglecting a task, attributing it to his behavior around women or children, and assigned it under supervision.

OP then called out J for neglecting a task, attributing it to his behavior around women or children, and assigned it under supervision.Reddit

OP scolded J for chatting outside instead of attending to customers, mentioning his behavior with a woman.

OP scolded J for chatting outside instead of attending to customers, mentioning his behavior with a woman.Reddit

OP says he still works with J frequently despite asking otherwise, so every blowup turns into another round of damage control.

Providing employees with the tools to understand and manage their behavior can lead to a healthier work environment.

It also echoes the unemployed roommate refusing to pay bills after losing her job.

OP confronted J for touching and tickling a child he didn't know, instructing him to stop and focus on his job.

OP confronted J for touching and tickling a child he didn't know, instructing him to stop and focus on his job.Reddit

OP reprimands J for inappropriate comments, making him write down improvements and read them aloud.

OP reprimands J for inappropriate comments, making him write down improvements and read them aloud.Reddit

Engaging employees in the process of setting behavior standards can foster a sense of ownership and responsibility.

When employees feel involved in the decision-making process, they are more likely to adhere to established guidelines.

Creating a collaborative environment can enhance team cohesion and improve overall performance.

OP redirects J's task or assigns him a new one after reprimanding him, managing the store alone.

OP redirects J's task or assigns him a new one after reprimanding him, managing the store alone.Reddit

OP uses this method to help J understand how others perceive him, aiming to prevent time wastage.

OP uses this method to help J understand how others perceive him, aiming to prevent time wastage.Reddit

The manager reportedly publicly reprimands J after mistakes, and the flirting and “making a woman uncomfortable” moment is where everyone starts watching more closely.

When workplace discipline feels like navigating a minefield, maybe it's time to swap the megaphone for a manual on empathy.

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J had a meltdown, but OP can't leave due to her autoimmune condition.

Scroll down to see what people had to say...

J had a meltdown, but OP can't leave due to her autoimmune condition.Reddit

J's problem isn't autism; it's a Ph.D. in creepology.

J's problem isn't autism; it's a Ph.D. in creepology.Reddit

"You could be doing some harm if you don't get professional guidance on this."

"You could be doing some harm if you don't get professional guidance on this."Reddit

This business is one subpoena away from a 'Legal Limbo' marathon.

This business is one subpoena away from a 'Legal Limbo' marathon.Reddit

Looks like they've mastered the art of workplace wizardry! Outstanding professionalism in action.

Looks like they've mastered the art of workplace wizardry! Outstanding professionalism in action.Reddit

Tears don't always equal truth. Even villains shed a tear or two!

Tears don't always equal truth. Even villains shed a tear or two!Reddit

He's less an employee and more a walking liability! NTBF.

He's less an employee and more a walking liability! NTBF.Reddit

Looks like they've got a full-time job being a professional babysitter!

Looks like they've got a full-time job being a professional babysitter!Reddit

"He is being predatory at work."

"He is being predatory at work."Reddit

When OP calls J out again for neglecting a task and ties it to how he acts around women or children, the whole “improve behavior” plan starts looking like punishment in disguise.

The recent admission by a gas station manager regarding the public shaming of an autistic employee raises significant ethical concerns about behavior management in the workplace. Such actions not only reflect a failure to understand the complexities of neurodiversity but also jeopardize the fundamental principles of respect and dignity that should underpin any professional environment.

Rather than resorting to humiliation, fostering a culture of constructive feedback and positive reinforcement is crucial. The situation with J highlights the need for managers to be equipped with the skills to address challenging behaviors without compromising an employee's sense of self-worth. By emphasizing employee well-being, organizations can cultivate healthier dynamics that ultimately enhance morale and productivity.

Now OP is left wondering if the job got better, or if they just learned how to shame someone without getting fired for it.

For more family chaos, read the WIBTA fight over a long-planned vacation versus a last-minute Hawaii wedding.

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