Should I Keep My Friends Dog After She Used Him to Sabotage My Relationship?
WIBTA for keeping my friend's pet after discovering she trained it to sabotage my relationship with my girlfriend?
A 28-year-old man thought he was doing a simple favor, pet-sitting his friend’s dog for a week. He’s now stuck in the middle of jealousy, sabotage, and one very angry girlfriend.
His friend, the one who’s always made little comments about his relationship with Alex, went way too far. While she was gone, the dog destroyed Alex’s sentimental stuff, and after some digging, he discovered the dog was trained to target what Alex cares about. The sabotage worked, Alex was devastated, and when he confronted the friend, she straight-up admitted it.
Now she’s back, demanding the dog returned, and he’s wondering if keeping Rover is the only way to stop her from pulling this stunt again.
Original Post
So I'm (28M) and I am really torn about this situation. I agreed to pet-sit my friend's dog, Rover, while she went on a trip for a week.
I've known her for years, and we've always had a great friendship. Little did I know, she had ulterior motives.
For context, my friend has always been jealous of my relationship with my girlfriend, Alex. She's made subtle comments, but I never thought she would go this far.
When my friend left Rover with me, I noticed odd behaviors like Rover destroying certain items that held sentimental value to Alex. After some investigation, I found out my friend had trained Rover to destroy things that Alex cherishes.
She hoped this would cause discord between us, and it did. Alex was devastated, thinking I couldn't control my friend's dog.
When I confronted my friend, she admitted to her actions and said she did it out of jealousy. I was furious but also heartbroken that she would stoop so low.
Now that she's back, she's demanding I return Rover. She says it's her dog and she needs him back.
But I can't bring myself to give the pup back to someone who used him as a tool to harm my relationship. I feel like keeping Rover would protect Alex and me from any future sabotage attempts.
My friend is upset and claims I'm overreacting. So, Reddit, with all this drama, would I be the a*****e for refusing to return my friend's pet after what she did?
Expert Insight
Comment from u/Adventure_Seeker23

Comment from u/Bookworm_87

Comment from u/CoffeeAddict99
That “just a pet-sit” turned into a full-on relationship crisis the second Rover started wrecking Alex’s keepsakes while the friend was out of town.
A significant portion of this behavior can stem from insecurities.
Comment from u/SunflowerDreamer
Comment from u/MusicJunkie42
Comment from u/PizzaLover777
After he investigated and realized Rover was trained to target Alex’s sentimental items, the whole friendship suddenly felt like a setup.
This also matches the dilemma in the post about cooking with a partner’s allergen despite their food-allergy warning.
Practical Recommendations
It’s crucial to establish healthy boundaries with friends. If a friend’s actions threaten your relationship, it may be beneficial to reevaluate the friendship.
Additionally, focusing on building trust with your girlfriend through open communication is recommended. Regular check-ins about feelings and concerns can strengthen your bond and prevent misunderstandings, ensuring that both partners feel secure in the relationship.
Comment from u/StarlitSky23
Comment from u/SleeplessNights80
Comment from u/LunaSea9
When he confronted his friend and she admitted she did it out of jealousy, the demand to “just return Rover” stopped sounding reasonable.
Being aware of how jealousy can influence behavior is key.
Comment from u/MountainHiker55
Now that Rover is back in the picture and Alex is already hurt, he’s stuck deciding whether handing the dog over makes him complicit again.
Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section.
The Reddit post highlights the tangled web of emotions that can arise when friendship intersects with personal relationships. The protagonist's experience with his friend's dog, Rover, serves as a poignant reminder of how jealousy can manifest in unexpected ways. The situation escalates when the friend uses Rover as a pawn in her attempts to sabotage the protagonist's new romance, revealing a significant breach of trust that complicates their friendship.
Communication emerges as a key theme in this narrative. The protagonist must consider whether an open dialogue with his friend can clarify intentions and potentially mend the rift caused by her actions. Navigating this emotional terrain will require mutual respect and a commitment to honesty, but the path to rebuilding trust may prove to be fraught with difficulties.
This situation underscores the destructive impact of jealousy and its ability to distort interpersonal relationships. The friend's decision to use her dog as a tool for sabotage reveals underlying insecurities and a fear of losing connection, ultimately leading to a harmful confrontation instead of open dialogue. It serves as a cautionary tale about the consequences of unaddressed emotions, reminding us that failing to communicate can not only fracture friendships but also jeopardize our own emotional health.
If she can train a dog to sabotage love, nobody should be surprised when the real fight is over the dog.
Jealousy and sabotage are one thing, but see how one man refused in-laws after dismissed food allergies, in this AITA about refusing an in-law stay.