Should My Sister Only Enter Plus-Size Pageants and Modeling?

Are you the jerk for suggesting that your sister stick to plus-size beauty pageants and modeling? This Reddit thread explores a complex family dynamic in which a 27-year-old woman struggles to find her place in the competitive world of beauty pageants.

Despite her success in plus-size pageants, she faced disappointment when competing against thinner contestants. The original poster seeks advice after being accused of jealousy for offering guidance to her sister.

The thread showcases varying opinions on the matter. Some users point out the competitive nature of the industry and suggest that age might affect her chances.

Others emphasize the importance of self-worth beyond physical appearances. The discussion touches on the toxic beauty standards perpetuated by pageants and the need for a thicker skin in the industry.

The sisters' emotional reactions and self-esteem are central issues in the conversation. The debate around body image, societal beauty standards, and personal growth adds depth to the discourse.

Overall, the thread raises thought-provoking questions about beauty standards, competition, and self-acceptance in the world of beauty pageants and modeling. Join the discussion to share your perspective on the situation and offer insights into navigating such sensitive topics with loved ones.

Original Post

I (31f) have a sister (27f) who have done beauty pageants all her life. Losing effects her more the older she gets.

At 22 she gained weight and became plus-size. As a plus-size woman, she had won every plus-size beauty pageant she's entered.

But as a plus-size woman, she has yet to win a beauty pageant that's not specifically for plus-size women. She has done some plus-size modeling but treats it like a stepping stone.

Recently, she did extremely well for a plus-size 27 year old woman in a beauty pageant available to all women. She got runner-up but the winner was a thin 19 year old woman.

Afterwards, she was crying and asking what she'll do now. I gave her advice but she accused me of being jealous.

Am I the a*****e ?

Self-Concept and Beauty Standards

The beauty industry can significantly impact an individual's self-concept. According to research by Jennifer Harriger, women exposed to thin-ideal beauty standards often experience decreased body satisfaction and increased disordered eating. The sister's struggle to transition from plus-size to standard pageants may reflect these negative impacts.

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It's crucial to understand the effects of the sister's transition on her mental health. The stress of competing in a different category might lead to psychological distress. A study by Flett and Hewitt shows that perfectionism, often cultivated in competitive environments like pageantry, can result in depression and anxiety.

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Nurturing Positive Body Image

Encouraging individuals to embrace their unique body types is essential for fostering a positive body image. A study by Tracy Tylka suggests that promoting body acceptance and discouraging societal and media beauty standards can improve body appreciation. So, it might be helpful for the sister to focus on plus-size modeling, where her body type is celebrated.

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The suggestion to focus on plus-size pageants might not be rooted in jealousy, but in concern for the sister's well-being. Offering guidance should be done sensitively, as it can be perceived as criticism. According to research by Givertz, Segrin, and Hanzal, unsolicited advice can strain relationships and lead to feelings of incompetence.

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Impact of Social Comparison

Competing against thinner contestants might trigger social comparison, which can harm self-esteem. Research by Leon Festinger suggests humans have a natural tendency to compare themselves to others, especially in competitive environments. It's crucial to manage these comparisons to protect mental health.

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It's important to foster supportive environments in competitive spaces. According to research by Baumeister and Leary, humans have an innate need to belong. Fostering inclusive spaces in pageantry, where all body types are celebrated, can fulfil this need and boost self-esteem.

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The Role of Empathy

Understanding and empathizing with the sister's situation can improve the family dynamic. As suggested in a study by Laura Empson, empathy can foster emotional intelligence and improve interpersonal relationships. This might help in navigating the complex family dynamics presented in this situation.

What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments.

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, understanding the psychological impacts of the beauty industry and its standards can help navigate complex situations like this one. By promoting body acceptance, managing social comparisons, and fostering empathy, we can support individuals in their journey within the pageantry world. It's not about limiting oneself to a specific category but finding a space where one can thrive while maintaining their mental health.

Expert Opinion

This situation underscores the psychological impact of societal beauty standards and competitive environments. The sister's distress could stem from a fear of rejection or feelings of inadequacy, often exacerbated by industry pressures. It's important to promote self-acceptance and manage social comparisons to maintain mental health.

Dr Aaron Mills

Psychologist