Should I Return My Cat to the Breeder? AITA for Keeping Him?

A Reddit user thought they were doing the right thing for a Maine Coon, until a “few days” request turned into a full-on custody battle over a cat they were just starting to trust.

They had always wanted a Maine Coon, but the one they previously dealt with was basically a Wish.com version of the breed. This time, an acquaintance who runs a Maine Coon cattery offered them one of two male cats at a huge discount, with a very specific condition: he needed to be treated well and neutered, because the cattery had genetic diversity issues and wanted him placed somewhere stable.

But after a February trial went surprisingly well, the breeder changed the plan, and now the cat is scheduled to be neutered Monday while they’re pushing to take him back, or even bring a female to their house to breed, and OP is panicking about what happens next.

Original Post

Backstory: we’ve always wanted a Maine C**n. Got one a few years ago that turned out to be a wish.com Maine C**n.

One of our acquaintances runs a Maine C**n cattery and due to lack of genetic diversity needed to rehome their two male cats. We were offered one of the males at an extremely reduced rate, to ensure that he went somewhere where he would a) be treated like a prince and b) be neutered, and not just bred again.

**Important context: we have a very skittish, came from a hoarding colony, seized by the council cat. She’s a rescue and our little angel who can do no wrong.

She’s also not fond of other cats but tolerates cat #2 who’s affectionately known as the bitchcraft.** We thanked them for thinking of us as suitable and asked if he could come on a few days’ trial to see how the cats’ chemistry would be (1. Feb).

Turns out he’s a total himbo and a very submissive cat, so while she isn’t *fond* of him, she’s also very quickly realised that he’s not going to try and beat her. We accepted, and thought that was that.

Confirmed that we would like to keep him 8/9 of February and paid a symbolic amount for microchip transfer on the 10th. Yesterday, 19/2, we got a message that they would like him back “for a few days”, because one of their girls weren’t pregnant like they thought she was.

We’re super hesitant, as they’ve only just started jelling + he’s scheduled to be neutered this coming Monday. They then pushed on that they could pick him up in the morning and drop him off at night and that he’d “get the job done”.

We again said that we’re not comfortable with him leaving the house and they asked if they could instead bring the female to our house to breed. Our girls are scheduled to be out of the house for a few hours this weekend, so we agreed, but now they’re talking about taking him with them.

We’re super uncomfortable with the whole situation since it was stipulated by them to get him neutered ASAP and now they want him back. We’re also worried they’d keep him beyond the “scheduled time” if he doesn’t breed her and then he’d miss his neuter.

They’re being super pushy and now doing some weird “do you know how much these cats sell for?” Spiel. Our argument is that he’s only just stopped calling for his old household and that our girls would lose their mind if he came back smelling weird again.

He’s also just a little baby cat (2) and isn’t titled. AITA??

Ethical Considerations in Pet Ownership

When it comes to pet ownership, ethical considerations play a significant role in decision-making.

Comment from u/Oma2Fae

Comment from u/AtomicVulpes

OP was already on edge because their skittish rescue Maine Coon came from a hoarding colony, and the last thing they wanted was another cat disrupting her fragile peace.

The dilemma of whether to return a cat to its breeder raises important questions about the emotional and psychological well-being of pets. The Reddit user sharing their Maine Coon experience highlights that pets, like humans, thrive in environments where they feel secure. In this case, the user received the cat under specific conditions, emphasizing the need for proper care and neutering. This agreement reflects a deeper responsibility that pet owners must embrace. Understanding the emotional needs of our furry companions is crucial, as it can lead to more compassionate decisions regarding their future. The choice to keep the cat instead of returning it to the breeder illustrates a commitment to ensuring the pet's welfare, showcasing the importance of empathy in navigating such challenging decisions.

Comment from u/yetzhragog

Comment from u/fxckhalie

Then the “total himbo” male they were offered started jelling fast, and OP paid for microchip transfer on February 10 like they were finally getting a happy ending.

This is also like the AITA where someone refused to share genetic health info with family, even at big gatherings.

The relationship between a person and their pet often mirrors familial ties, as seen in the case of the Reddit user grappling with the decision to return their Maine Coon to the breeder. The article highlights the emotional weight of such a choice, suggesting that pets are not just animals but integral parts of their owners' lives. Returning a pet can trigger profound feelings of loss and guilt, impacting both the human and the animal involved.

This emotional complexity emphasizes the need for careful deliberation before making a decision that could sever such a meaningful bond. The user's predicament serves as a reminder of the responsibilities that come with pet ownership and the deep connections we form with our furry companions.

Comment from u/basestay

Comment from u/Excellent_Put2890

That’s when, on February 19, the breeder texted they wanted him back “for a few days” because one of their girls wasn’t pregnant, despite the whole deal being neuter-first.

Practical solutions for pet owners facing dilemmas about rehoming include exploring alternatives such as fostering or seeking support from animal behaviorists.

Engaging in open discussions with family and professionals can also provide valuable insights and support, helping owners make decisions that prioritize the welfare of the animal while considering their own circumstances.

Comment from u/wndrgrl555

Comment from u/Gullible_Bar_7019

Now the breeder is trying morning pickup and night drop-off, or swapping the breeding plan by bringing the female over while OP’s cats are out, and OP feels like the rug is getting pulled again.

We'd love to hear your take on this situation. Share your thoughts below.

Comment from u/AriGryphon

In the case of the Reddit user wrestling with the decision to return their Maine Coon to the breeder, the ethical and emotional responsibilities of pet ownership are highlighted. The situation underscores the importance of understanding the bond formed between owners and their pets. The user was offered the cat under the premise of providing a loving home, which complicates the decision to return him.

This dilemma illustrates how open communication and the exploration of all available options can help in making compassionate choices for both the pet and the owner. Ultimately, the well-being of the animal must be at the forefront of any decision made.

OP isn’t just worried about a cat leaving the house, they’re worried the breeder will undo everything that made him safe in the first place.

Then see if OP was right to hide money troubles from their roommate, in Struggling to Pay Rent, should I tell my roommate?.