Should I Tell My Cousin to Leave Her Reborn Baby at Home for My Wedding?

Are you wondering if you would be in the wrong for not wanting your cousin's reborn baby doll at your wedding? The situation involves a cousin who has been using a realistic doll baby to cope with the loss of her stillborn child.

She brings the doll everywhere, treating it like a real baby, even expecting family members to care for it during events. The OP finds the doll creepy and uncomfortable, especially since the cousin wants to include it in wedding photos.

The Reddit thread is filled with various opinions. Some suggest the cousin needs therapy, while others recommend setting boundaries for the wedding.

Many commenters agree that it's not healthy for the cousin to replace her grief with the doll. Suggestions include having a "no babies" rule at the wedding or offering to pay for a babysitter for the doll.

The discussion delves into the cousin's need for professional help, the OP's right to set boundaries for their wedding day, and the potential fallout from addressing the issue with the cousin. The diverse viewpoints offer insight into handling delicate family situations with empathy and assertiveness.

Original Post

So, I (25) am getting married in about a year. The date is set for 2026.

This is about my cousin (Shelly), who is 28. Shelly gave birth a little over a year ago, and the baby was a stillbirth.

She is still mourning, and soon after, she got a reborn baby (it's a very realistic doll baby), and that thing freaks me out. She acts like it is a real baby and brings it everywhere.

I understand she is mourning, but I am not comfortable with it, and during family events, I ignore that whole situation. It is not uncommon for her to have family members hold her baby when she goes to the bathroom.

I always refuse to do so, but other family members will, and they have gotten scolded for refusing to take care of the doll if she needs to do something. She treats it like it is a baby, and I find it creepy.

Today was a family event (Memorial Day), and she brought it to the family picnic. During pictures, Shelly included the reborn baby and refused to put it down (her mom asked), which started a mini-argument.

The reborn baby stayed in the pictures. Later, I was talking to my sister, whose child is going to be the flower girl for the wedding.

I was discussing getting photos before the wedding and focusing on group pictures for the wedding. Shelly said it would be cute to do photos, and her "baby" could be propped up for the pictures.

After this, I realized I do not want that doll at the wedding. I don't want my family members to have to take care of a doll like they already do at family events. I don't want to have to fight her not to include the baby in photos.

I also find it so creepy and just don't want it at the wedding in the first place. I can't really go to my family for opinions on this because I know this will get back to her.

My future husband is on my side with this, but I want some other opinions.
So, would I be a massive a*****e if I tell her not to bring her reborn baby to the wedding?

Understanding Mourning and Its Impact on Family Events

Dr. Olivia Matthews, a clinical psychologist at Columbia University, explains that mourning can profoundly affect individual behavior and family dynamics.

Research shows that individuals coping with loss may exhibit behaviors that can be perceived as disruptive or extreme.

In this case, the cousin’s mourning behavior may impact the wedding atmosphere, raising important questions about the appropriateness of including the reborn baby.

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Experts in grief counseling suggest that mourning can lead to socially awkward situations, particularly in celebratory contexts.

According to studies published in the Journal of Counseling Psychology, individuals in grief may struggle to navigate social norms, leading to potential discomfort for others.

Understanding this can help family members approach the situation with compassion rather than judgment.

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The Psychological Dimensions of Grief

Grief does not follow a linear path and can manifest in various ways, impacting interpersonal relationships.

Research suggests that individuals may oscillate between emotional states, which can complicate their ability to engage in social contexts.

In this scenario, recognizing the cousin’s grief can help foster empathy and understanding within the family.

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Creating supportive environments for grieving individuals is crucial.

Family therapists recommend open dialogues about how to handle sensitive situations, such as weddings, in light of grief.

Establishing boundaries while being understanding can help balance the needs of all family members involved.

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Navigating Emotional Sensitivities in Family Celebrations

Family celebrations can be particularly challenging for those dealing with loss.

Research has shown that creating spaces for dialogue about emotional sensitivities can enhance family cohesion.

In this case, discussing the cousin’s needs may help ensure that the wedding remains a joyous occasion while respecting her grief.

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Encouraging empathy can lead to more meaningful family interactions during difficult times.

Studies indicate that fostering an understanding of each other’s emotional states can help reduce tensions and create a more harmonious environment.

In this scenario, encouraging family discussions about grief may allow for a more inclusive and supportive wedding atmosphere.

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Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section.

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Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the emotional intricacies of combining grief with family events, particularly in celebratory contexts.

Acknowledging these emotions can help families navigate the delicate balance between honoring grief and celebrating milestones, ultimately fostering stronger familial bonds.

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Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, navigating the complexities of grief during family celebrations requires sensitivity and understanding.

As the American Psychological Association emphasizes, creating open lines of communication can help families support one another through difficult emotional landscapes.

By fostering empathy and understanding, families can create a more inclusive environment that honors both grief and celebration.