Should I Tell My Dad About My Partners Criminal Past?

AITA for keeping my partner's criminal past a secret from my traditional father? Opinions are divided on whether honesty or protection should prevail.

Davy

Published in Interesting
2025-08-20 07:26

Should I Tell My Dad About My Partners Criminal Past?

Are you the type who believes in full transparency in relationships, or do you think some things are better left unsaid? One Reddit user finds themselves torn between their father's values of honesty and their desire to protect their significant other's privacy.

The 29-year-old woman has been dating someone with a non-violent criminal past related to substance abuse from their early 20s. Despite their partner's transformation into a responsible individual post-rehab, she has kept this information from her traditional father, fearing his judgment may affect their relationship.

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As the user grapples with the guilt of withholding this crucial detail, Reddit users have weighed in on whether she is in the wrong (YTA) for not disclosing the past to her father or if she's justified (NTA) in protecting her partner's privacy. Some suggest open communication with both her partner and father to navigate this delicate situation better, while others emphasize the importance of honesty in family dynamics to avoid potential fallout in the future.

The thread highlights the complexities of balancing loyalty, honesty, and privacy in relationships, leaving room for diverse perspectives on what constitutes the right course of action.

Original Post

So I'm a 29-year-old woman, and I've been dating my partner for over a year now. We're in a serious relationship, and I truly love them.

However, my partner has a criminal record from their past - nothing violent or harmful to others, just some minor offenses related to substance a***e in their early 20s. They've since turned their life around, gone through rehab, and are now a completely different person.

Here's the issue: my father is very traditional and values honesty above all else. He believes in transparency, especially when it comes to significant others.

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I've always had a close relationship with him, and I know he expects me to share everything with him. I've never mentioned my partner's past to my father.

I'm afraid he'll judge them unfairly, not see the person they've become, and potentially disapprove of our relationship. My partner is now a responsible, kind, and reliable individual, and I believe everyone deserves a second chance.

Recently, my father mentioned how much he appreciates that I can trust and confide in him, which made me feel incredibly guilty. I've been struggling with the dilemma of whether to tell him the truth or continue keeping this information from him to protect my partner.

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I understand the importance of honesty, but I also don't want to jeopardize my relationship or hurt my partner. So, Reddit, AITA for not telling my father about my significant other's criminal past?