Dying Father Considers Giving More in His Will to His Son Than His Successful Daughter, Gets Accused of Being Misogynistic

"I simply wanted to give back to my son for helping me."

Many of us are aware of what a will is. A will is a legal document that outlines your preferences for the allocation of your assets and the upbringing of any minor children.

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Some people believe that wills are only necessary for the extremely wealthy or those with complex possessions. However, having a will is a smart idea for many reasons.

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The original poster of today's story has Stage 4 lung cancer, so he may not have even a year left to live. His daughter, who is 30, and his son, who is 26, have both ended up on very different paths in life.

"Like the rest of the women in our family, my daughter wanted to go to medical school and study to become a dermatologist, as she wanted to have a successful job no matter what," OP writes.

OP's daughter is currently working her dream job and making a very good living, but he can't say the same for his son.

"In order to focus more on taking care of his now-late mother (and then me after I got lung cancer), my son has completely focused on working only minimum-wage jobs so that he can have more time to care for us," says the OP.

The OP wants to give a large portion of his wealth to his son, which has brought on a lot of misogynistic comments from his daughter and the rest of the family. Keep scrolling to read the entire story for yourself.

The Headline

The HeadlineReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe
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OP's Daughter Wanted to Go to Medical School and Study

OP's Daughter Wanted to Go to Medical School and StudyReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe
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OP's Son Has Completely Focused on Working Only Minimum Wage Jobs

OP's Son Has Completely Focused on Working Only Minimum Wage JobsReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

The Psychology of Favoritism

Dr. Natalie Kim, a psychologist at the University of Toronto, explains that favoritism in families can lead to significant emotional consequences for both parents and siblings.

Research indicates that perceived unequal treatment can foster feelings of inadequacy and resentment among siblings, which can have lasting impacts on their relationships.

This can create a rift within the family dynamic, leading to ongoing conflicts and emotional distress.

OP's Daughter Potentially Believes That He's Favoring the Son More Than Her

OP's Daughter Potentially Believes That He's Favoring the Son More Than HerReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

OP Has Offered the Following Explanation for Why They Think They Might Be the A-Hole:

1) I wanted to give more to my son than to my daughter in my will because I felt grateful to him for wanting to sacrifice his life to focus more on caring for me and my late wife. Also, I believe that my daughter doesn’t need much from me.2) I believe that I may be the A-Hole because I have family members (especially the women in the family) stating that what I am doing is considered “very misogynistic” and that I am “punishing my daughter for her successes.”

The Reddit Post Went Viral with Over a Thousand Comments, and Here Are a Bunch of Them

The Reddit Post Went Viral with Over a Thousand Comments, and Here Are a Bunch of ThemReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

This Redditor Lists Things Out

This Redditor Lists Things OutReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

Studies in developmental psychology show that favoritism can affect children's self-esteem and later interpersonal relationships. According to Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a clinical psychologist, "Favoritism can create deep emotional scars in children, leading to long-term issues with self-worth and interpersonal trust." Additionally, Dr. Shefali Tsabary, a parenting expert, emphasizes, "When parents show favoritism, it undermines the sibling bond and can lead to resentment that lasts into adulthood." This dynamic underscores the importance of equitable treatment in fostering healthy familial relationships.

The OP Needs to Have a Talk with the Son

The OP Needs to Have a Talk with the SonReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

OP's Son Will Need a Leg Up

OP's Son Will Need a Leg UpReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

The OP Can Divide His Estate as He Sees Fit

The OP Can Divide His Estate as He Sees FitReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

Exploring Motivations Behind Favoritism

Understanding the underlying motivations for favoritism can provide insights into family dynamics.

Research suggests that parents may consciously or unconsciously favor one child based on personality alignments or perceived capabilities, which can be problematic.

Recognizing these biases is crucial for parents aiming to maintain equitable relationships among their children.

He Can Still Go Back to School

He Can Still Go Back to SchoolReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

It's Good the OP Recognizes What His Son Has Done

It's Good the OP Recognizes What His Son Has DoneReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

The OP Should Have Had a Fair Compensation Conversation

The OP Should Have Had a Fair Compensation ConversationReddit/SonHelpsSupportMe

Experts recommend that parents actively work to recognize and address favoritism in their interactions with children.

This may involve open discussions about feelings of favoritism or ensuring equal opportunities for all children in various activities.

By promoting fairness, parents can foster healthier sibling relationships and mitigate feelings of resentment.

One's wishes might not be fulfilled if they pass away without a will. Moreover, after one passes away, their heirs might have to invest more time, money, and emotional energy in finalizing their affairs.

The OP was declared not the A-Hole in the story, and you too can leave your own verdict in the comments section below. Don't forget to share this post with your loved ones to get their opinions as well.

Psychological Analysis

This situation illustrates the complexities surrounding perceptions of favoritism in families.

It's vital for parents to recognize the implications of their actions on sibling relationships to mitigate feelings of resentment.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Understanding favoritism's psychological impacts is crucial for fostering healthy family dynamics.

As noted by Dr. William Doherty, a family therapist, "Equitable treatment among siblings is essential for developing strong familial bonds and preventing resentment." This sentiment is echoed by Dr. Pepper Schwartz, a sociologist, who emphasizes that "favoritism can lead to long-lasting emotional scars, affecting relationships well into adulthood." Ensuring fairness in familial relationships is vital for nurturing a supportive family environment.

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