Man Takes A Percentage Out Of His Son's Paychecks, Gets Accused Of Stealing

Saving and planning for college is a vital aspect of securing a student's future. By setting aside a percentage of earnings, individuals can accumulate funds to support their educational pursuits.

This proactive approach helps alleviate financial stress, allowing students to focus on their studies and extracurricular activities. Moreover, having a dedicated college fund demonstrates a commitment to personal growth and development.

It's essential for parents and guardians to guide their children in making informed decisions about their financial priorities. By doing so, they can help them navigate the complications of financial planning and ensure a smoother transition into higher education.

OP's approach to teaching his son financial responsibility seemed to be working well, with a plan to save for college and letting him handle his own food expenses. However, a recent incident involving a drunken night at home exposed underlying tensions and differing perspectives on money management.

The situation escalated into a heated argument over the college fund, with OP's son feeling frustrated about having a significant portion of his paycheck withheld. OP believes he is acting in his son's best interest, but the son feels like he's being deprived of his hard-earned money.

As the disagreement unfolds, it raises questions about the balance between saving for the future and living in the present. The situation is about to get even more interesting as you read the full story below.

OP says his son has known about this since he started working at 15 years

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The OP has put his son in charge of paying for his own food

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The OP has been around the block and he knows a drunk when he sees one

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Financial experts stress the importance of transparency in financial arrangements between parents and children. Suze Orman, a well-known financial advisor, emphasizes that open discussions about money can prevent misunderstandings and resentment.

When parents take a percentage of their children's earnings, it’s crucial to communicate the reasons behind it clearly. This way, the child can comprehend how these deductions contribute to their future, potentially easing feelings of theft or betrayal.

The importance of financial literacy in young adults cannot be overstated. As noted by Jean Chatzky, a financial journalist, teaching children about budgeting, saving, and the value of money should begin early. This foundation can help them understand the implications of their earnings and how deductions can work towards their future.

Incorporating financial education into family discussions can empower children, equipping them with skills they’ll need throughout life. Practical exercises like creating a savings plan can be valuable in this educational journey.

The OP doubts it's so little his son can't pay for three meals a day

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They just got into a huge argument over whether he should have the money or not

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Is the OP an AH for saving a percentage of his son's paycheck for college?

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Understanding the Impact of Financial Control

Experts in child psychology, such as Dr. Dan Siegel, highlight that financial control can affect a child's self-esteem and autonomy. When a young person feels they have no control over their earnings, it can lead to feelings of helplessness.

Siegel suggests that involving children in financial decisions can foster a sense of responsibility and ownership. This collaborative approach encourages discussions about budgeting and savings, ultimately empowering them to make informed choices in the future.

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the AH:

1: I take a percentage out of my son's paychecks for his college fund. 2: I might be the AH because it's causing him to be unable to budget properly, according to him.

The comments roll in...

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Making a little

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Teaching someone to budget

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Managing finances responsibly is essential for fostering independence in young adults. Financial planners recommend setting up a transparent saving plan where both parents and children agree on contributions.

This could include establishing a set percentage that is saved for college while allowing the child to retain a portion for personal spending. By doing this, parents can help their children learn the value of saving while also respecting their autonomy.

The OP reveals more in the comments saying:

I have access to his account because as I said, it's something we agreed upon beforehand. And he is involved in decision making, but only after I've set aside the important part - money for his future. What he does with the rest of it is up to him. I do understand it's his money, but with him being so close to attending college I just want him to see this through and then he can do what he wishes with it.

Specifying the percentage

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He lives at home

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Being magically relieved of responsibilities

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Open Communication is Key

Dr. John Thompson, a family therapist, emphasizes that the emotional dynamics between parents and children can become strained when financial issues arise. He notes that discussing finances openly can help mitigate these tensions.

Creating an environment where children feel comfortable expressing concerns about financial arrangements can lead to healthier family relationships. Thompson advises families to hold regular discussions about money management, which can promote understanding and reduce feelings of mistrust.

OP's son feels like he's being deprived of his earnings, while OP believes he is securing his future. The argument highlights the challenges of balancing short-term needs with long-term goals.

OP's son is feeling suffocated by the strict savings plan that makes him manage feeding, while OP is worried about his readiness for college. The situation raises questions about the importance of financial independence and the value of college education.

However, in this case, OP was declared the AH for not considering what the son goes through due to the savings. Drop your thoughts below, and don't forget to share as well.

Expert Opinion

This situation really underscores the tension between parental guidance and a child's desire for independence. The father’s intention to save for college reflects a common motivation to secure a child's future, but it can backfire if it feels controlling rather than supportive. The son’s frustration highlights a key psychological principle: when individuals feel deprived of autonomy, even when the intentions are good, it can lead to resentment and conflict. Balancing financial responsibility with personal freedom is a tricky but crucial part of parenting.

Psychological Insights & Implications

Ultimately, financial interactions between parents and their children should foster trust and mutual understanding. By prioritizing open communication, parents can alleviate feelings of resentment and build a solid foundation for financial responsibility in their children.

Experts like Suze Orman and Psychology Today advocate for collaborative financial planning and transparency, which not only prepares children for future financial decisions but also strengthens familial bonds. This balanced approach can help create a nurturing environment where both parties feel valued and empowered.