Struggling Omnivore Faces Backlash for Avoiding Vegan Fare at Partners Family Gathering
AITA for refusing to eat vegan food at my partner's family gathering? A clash of dietary preferences leads to an awkward situation at a vegan dinner.
A 28-year-old omnivore got invited to a vegan Thanksgiving expecting, at minimum, one normal, meat-adjacent side. Instead, the table was packed with tofu turkey, lentil loaf, and quinoa salad, all of it built to match the strict vegan routine her partner’s family swears by.
So he did what a lot of people would try to do in that awkward moment, he took a few bites out of respect, then quietly ducked to the bathroom and ate beef jerky he’d brought with him. That’s when an aunt caught him, called him disrespectful in front of everyone, and turned a holiday meal into a full-blown blowup.
The family dinner did not end well.
Original Post
So I'm (28M) and my partner (26F) have been together for two years. She comes from a family that's very health-conscious, and they follow a strict vegan diet.
On the other hand, I come from a family of meat-lovers, and I've always enjoyed a good steak or barbecue. For background, my partner has been encouraging me to eat more plant-based meals, and I've been trying, but it's hard to completely give up meat.
Recently, we were invited to her family's Thanksgiving dinner. I knew they would be serving a vegan feast, which I'm okay with to an extent, but I was hoping for at least one dish with some meat on the side.
Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. It was all dishes like tofu turkey, lentil loaf, and quinoa salad.
I tried a few bites of each dish out of respect for her family, but I just couldn't bring myself to enjoy it. I ended up discreetly eating some beef jerky I had in my pocket in the bathroom.
However, her aunt caught me sneaking a bite and made a big scene about it, calling me disrespectful and rude for not embracing their lifestyle, especially during a family gathering. My partner felt embarrassed, and we had a huge argument later about me not being more considerate of her family's beliefs.
She thinks I should have been more open-minded and at least tried to fully enjoy the vegan spread they prepared. I understand her perspective, but I also feel like my dietary preferences should be respected, especially when it's not something I'm used to.
So AITA for refusing to eat vegan food at my partner's family gathering?
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Right there at the Thanksgiving table, the OP tried tofu turkey and lentil loaf like it was no big deal, even though he wasn’t feeling it.
This also echoes the friend who asked to borrow money and the Redditor who refused.
Then the bathroom jerky move happened, and his partner’s aunt saw it, which instantly flipped the vibe from “polite” to “publicly called out.”
After that scene, the OP and his girlfriend argued later, with her saying he should have been more open-minded about every vegan dish.
Now the question is whether refusing to fully enjoy the vegan spread makes him the villain, or just someone who wanted meat at a meat-eater’s level of comfort.
What would you do in this situation? Share your opinion in the comments.
He might’ve meant to survive Thanksgiving, but he accidentally started a family feud with a pocket of beef jerky.
For a different kind of backlash, see why the cat owner risked eviction after his landlord’s ultimatum, AITA for standing up to his landlord over his beloved feline?
