Swimwear Choice Stirs Controversy for 31-Year-Old Woman at Corporate Retreat
"And they even accused me of wanting to show off to the men."
In the modern workplace, where balancing professionalism and personal expression is an everyday tightrope walk, one often encounters situations that test the boundaries of workplace etiquette. Our story today, shared by a 31-year-old woman, revolves around a dilemma set against the backdrop of a corporate retreat.
Working in a small firm of 12 employees, OP was part of a weekend stay at a golf resort, a reward for exceeding yearly goals. Among the amenities, including golf, a pool, tennis, and a gym, she spent her Saturday relaxing by the pool with cocktails, donning an athletic bikini that she had specifically purchased for the trip.
Though chosen for comfort and considering the setting, this attire became a point of contention. During a poolside lunch with her colleagues, the two other women in the company, slightly senior in age, called her choice of swimwear "gutsy," criticizing it as "stupid" and accusing her of seeking male attention.
This unexpected critique left her questioning her judgment. Was her swimsuit—which was more athletic than revealing—inappropriate for a casual, outdoor company event? The story takes an interesting turn with the revelation that she wasn't wearing the swimsuit at lunch but had covered up appropriately.
The setting was informal, an outdoor restaurant by the pool, where nobody was formally dressed.
OP is 31, works at a small firm with 12 employees, and recently they had a weekend at a golf resort because they met their 2022 goals.

On Saturday, OP relaxed by the pool and drank cocktails, anticipating a late lunch at the poolside restaurant.

Two other colleagues commented on OP's bold choice of attire, a sporty bikini.
Cultural Expectations and Body Image
Dr. Jennifer Smith, a psychologist specializing in body image issues, explains that societal expectations can heavily influence how women perceive their clothing choices.
When a woman feels scrutinized for her attire, it may trigger feelings of shame or inadequacy, particularly if she internalizes cultural norms about femininity and appropriateness.
This pressure can lead to anxiety in social situations, especially in professional settings where appearance is often unfairly judged.
They criticized OP for her actions, saying she should have known better and accused her of seeking attention from men.
OP bought this suit for the trip without much thought, believing it was plain.
OP didn't wear the swimsuit during lunch, and the restaurant was outdoors by the pool, where no one was dressed formally.
Research published in the Journal of Social Issues indicates that women frequently face a double bind concerning their appearance—being judged for both showing too much skin and for dressing too conservatively.
This phenomenon can create a cycle of self-doubt, as women may constantly adjust their clothing choices in an attempt to please those around them.
Understanding these societal pressures can empower women to make choices based on personal comfort rather than external expectations.
People have different boundaries when it comes to wearing a swimsuit on a work trip, and it's important to respect those boundaries.
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Dressing up beforehand instead of at the table would have attracted less attention.
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While there may not be specific dress code rules, it's advisable to avoid attire that could leave a lasting impression on coworkers.
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The Psychology of Dress and Identity
Psychologists assert that clothing is a powerful form of self-expression and can significantly impact self-esteem.
Individuals often dress in ways that reflect their identity, values, and aspirations, which means that feeling criticized for these choices can feel like a personal attack.
By embracing personal style, individuals can cultivate a stronger sense of self, enabling them to resist external judgments.
Swimwear is fine for a yacht or pool party, but it wasn't appropriate for a regular lunch with others.
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This is a double standard and sexist behavior.
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OP's behavior might have made the two other women feel uncomfortable.
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Moreover, addressing the emotional responses tied to clothing choices can be crucial for personal empowerment.
Therapeutic approaches that encourage self-affirmation and body positivity can help individuals reframe their perception of clothing as an expression of self rather than a point of conflict.
Research shows that fostering a positive body image can reduce anxiety and enhance overall well-being.
OP should have covered up before entering the restaurant.
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Wearing a bathing suit with a cover-up during a work trip lunch is seen as unprofessional.
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Company trips require a more conservative approach, and it's important to dress appropriately when with coworkers.
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Navigating Social Dynamics at Work
Understanding workplace dynamics is crucial when navigating issues of appearance and judgment.
Encouraging open dialogues about dress codes can create a more inclusive environment, allowing individuals to express themselves authentically.
Workshops on diversity and inclusion can also help break down stereotypes and promote acceptance of varied expressions in the workplace.
People have different ideas about what's acceptable to wear on a work trip. We should respect those differences.
Even though there weren't any strict rules about how to dress, using common sense is important. The comments OP received from her coworkers were mean and unfair. It's not right that they judged her like that, and it can be seen as unfair and sexist.
It's important to stand up against these kinds of stereotypes and biases at work. But at the same time, it's wise to consider the situation and what others might expect at company events, especially when you're with your colleagues.
Dressing appropriately is advisable. When you're on a work trip, it's usually better to dress in a way that's not too flashy or out of place.
It's about finding a balance between showing your style and being professional. Most importantly, it's about ensuring everyone feels comfortable and treated fairly at work.
Psychological Analysis
This situation highlights the intricate balance between personal identity and societal expectations.
From a psychological standpoint, it’s essential to recognize that clothing choices are deeply personal and often reflect broader issues of self-acceptance and societal pressures.
Analysis generated by AI
Analysis & Alternative Approaches
In conclusion, the intersection of cultural expectations and personal expression in clothing can lead to significant psychological distress. As Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, a renowned happiness researcher, states, "When individuals feel free to express themselves authentically, it fosters a sense of belonging and enhances overall well-being." Creating an environment that celebrates diversity in self-expression can indeed enhance employee satisfaction. Ultimately, fostering acceptance and understanding around attire choices can lead to a more harmonious workplace.