Woman Clashes With Childhood Friend Over Her Habit of Bringing Teen Daughter to Their "Adults-Only" Hangouts

A 28-year-old woman refused to play along with her “adults-only” hangout rule, and her childhood friend did not take it well. It wasn’t a blow-up in a bar, it was a slow-motion friendship crash that started with one trip invitation and ended with OP feeling like the rules only mattered when it was convenient.

OP and Shelly had planned a “Friendversary” trip, the kind where it’s supposed to be just the adults, no kids, no extras. But every time Shelly wanted adult time, her teen daughter somehow showed up too. OP opted out, and Shelly was stuck defending why her daughter was included while other kids were supposedly excluded.

Now the comments are all about one thing: whether Shelly was trying to make adult time happen, or whether someone else was calling the shots.

Let’s Dig Into the Details

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A Little Background

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OP and Shelly Recently Planned a “Friendversary” Trip, Only for Shelly to Invite Her Daughter. Well, OP Didn’t Hesitate to Opt Out.

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Shelly’s “Friendversary” invite sounded simple at first, until her teen daughter showed up for the “adults-only” part.

This scenario highlights the complexities of friendship dynamics, particularly when it comes to family involvement.

Here’s how the Reddit community reacted to the story:

We Wonder What the Husband’s Real Motive Is

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"Springing her daughter on you every time you have adult time, and excluding your kids, is not fair to anyone."

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"Adults need adult time sometimes. It sounds like Shelly is simply appeasing her controlling husband."

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OP’s opt-out decision had people side-eyeing Shelly’s husband, especially when the daughter kept getting inserted into adult time.

This is also like the girls trip where a best friend got banned for bringing her boyfriend against travel rules.

Psychological studies indicate that feelings of discomfort in social situations can stem from differing expectations.

"To me, it sounds like your friend might really need a friend right now and also need to get away from her husband."

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"It seems like your friend wants her daughter to have a relationship with you."

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"Strong NTA. There's a difference between girls and women."

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Commenters kept circling the same issue, that hanging out with OP felt different when it included the daughter instead of staying separate.

Establishing boundaries in adult friendships is crucial for maintaining healthy interactions.

"Why don’t you just start talking about middle-age inappropriate bullsh*t anyway? Swear a few times and drink a lot."

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"The daughter needs to understand that you are not her BFF. Complete separation for some time might help."

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Hanging Out with Your Friend Alone Has a Different Feeling Than Hanging Out with Your Friend and Their Teen Daughter

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By the time people suggested firm boundaries, the trip had already turned into a test of who gets to set the rules for friendship time.

Establishing guidelines about who is invited to adult hangouts can help create a comfortable atmosphere for all parties involved.

Regularly revisiting these guidelines can ensure that everyone feels respected and valued in the friendship.

The Reddit community is fully in support of OP’s decision to opt out of the trip. Commenters have reiterated that adults need adult time, and it should be a completely separate hangout from family gatherings.

Most commenters have also criticized Shelly’s husband, as they believe he’s to blame for disrupting any exclusive plans that OP and Shelly make for themselves.

Hopefully, the pair can find a way to talk things over and preserve their friendship for years to come.

We’d love to get your thoughts on this story. Join the conversation in the comments.

The conflict between the woman and her childhood friend highlights the delicate balance between friendship and family dynamics.

The “adults-only” trip wasn’t adults-only at all, and OP is probably better off skipping the next round.

Before you judge Shelly, see why OP confronted a flaky friend over last-minute cancellations.