Teens Push Back After Being Punished By Mom For Not Speaking With Distant Relatives

Raising kids often means trying to pass down values that once felt automatic. For this parent, staying connected to extended family has always been one of those non-negotiables.

Calls on birthdays. Messages during holidays. Small gestures meant to keep family bonds alive, even across oceans.

The challenge is that geography has done most of the separating. Two sisters live in the UK, and their children are much younger.

The kids have only met one set of cousins once, during a visit a few years ago. On the other side of the family, cousins are older and familiar, making those relationships feel more natural. The difference shows.

Over time, reminders became routine. Call your cousin. Send a message. Wish them happy holidays.

The younger child goes along with it, but the teenagers push back more and more. One comment in particular landed hard. Being told they were being forced to talk to people they do not even know struck a nerve.

That moment spiraled. Voices were raised. Emotions took over. What started as a reminder turned into a full argument, leaving everyone annoyed and disconnected. The teens felt pressured and misunderstood. The parent felt hurt, disrespected, and worried that important family values were slipping away.

Now comes the second-guessing. Was the frustration justified? Was yelling too much?

Is it fair to expect teens to maintain relationships that feel distant and unfamiliar to them, or is that part of growing up in a family with deep roots across borders?

It is one of those parenting moments where intention and outcome do not match, and the line between guidance and control feels blurry.

Read through the screenshots below to see how the situation unfolded in their own words.

Let’s dig into the details

A bit of background

OP and her kids fell out after she kept forcing them to talk to their distant cousins. They just didn’t see why it was necessary talking to people they aren’t familiar with

After OP yelled at her kids, she felt a bit guilty. However, the Reddit community has been asked to look into the situation

We gathered some interesting comments from the Reddit community

“No, you just yelled. Own your sh*t, apologize, and stop forcing people to talk to randos on the phone.”

“YTA. They're strangers who they happen to be related to.”

“Your kids have never been close with these people, it’s just mean to be try and make them.”

“YTA. Stop trying to force a relationship that doesn’t exist. Relationships exist out of organic interaction.”

“They have only met 1 kid on your side of the family 1 time and this reads like that child was 3 years old at that time.”

“Trying to force them to talk to each other is just awkward for everyone.”

“YTA losing your temper with your kids for telling you the truth is a great way to make them not want to talk to you in the future.”

Wanting kids to value family connections often comes from love and tradition, but teenagers experience relationships differently, especially when there is distance and a significant age gap.

Both sides are reacting from understandable places. One wants respect for family bonds that matter deeply. The other wants agency over who they connect with and how. The conflict may not be about phone calls at all, but about feeling heard without being forced.

Where do you land on this? Should teens be pushed to maintain extended family ties, or should those bonds form naturally over time? Share your thoughts in the comments.