Woman Gets Roasted on Twitter For Not Knowing How To Speak To A Trans Cafe Server

A simple coffee run turned into a Twitter pile-on after one woman reportedly froze up over how to address a cafe server she thought might be transgender.

Gad Saad said his wife felt anxious in the moment, then tried to explain that the confusion came from not knowing which pronoun to use while speaking to the barista and another server. That quickly sparked backlash online, with plenty of people saying the whole exchange could have been handled without bringing gender into it at all.

The reactions only got sharper from there, and Saad later added more context. Read on.

Recently, professor and evolutionary psychologist Gad Saad posted on Twitter about his wife, who he says was "frozen in fear" when she visited a cafe and wasn't sure of the proper pronoun to address the barista.

MIKI Yoshihito

He mentioned that his wife became anxious when she noticed the person making her coffee was "possibly" transgender.

Instagram / doctorgadsaad

You can read Saad's post in full below.

Twitter / GadSaad

Saad explained that he and his wife have no issue accepting transgender people; however, they sometimes find it difficult to know which pronouns should be used when addressing a trans person.

Twitter / GadSaad

"Fighting for a world free of bigotry does not imply that we must suppress perfectly natural categorization mechanisms that are built into our brains and our languages," Saad said in his tweet.

Twitter / GadSaad

He explained that the confusion arose when his wife wanted to inform another server that their colleague was already taking care of her order. She didn't know if she should refer to them as "he," "she," or "they."

Twitter / GadSaad

That explanation did not calm people down.

Here's how people reacted.

Twitter / MidwestHedgie

Pretty simple, really.

Twitter / knowngaslighter

"The gender looked at me."

Twitter / BrattyBekka

Just say, "hi."

Twitter / rhodri

People kept pointing out that ordering coffee does not require a pronoun quiz.

This is similar to the AITA about not paying a struggling friend’s dinner bill, even after agreeing.

The mind boggles.

Twitter / janusrose

"Hello, can I have a latte?"

Twitter / FaggyMcDykepuff

No need for a culture war.

Twitter / MarisaKabas

"You can imagine how little sympathy I have."

Twitter / samdylanfinch

Some replies were blunt, others just sarcastic.

"Fixed. You're welcome."

Twitter / cmclymer

"Ladies and gentlemen, do you take Apple Pay?"

Twitter / RahulKohli13

Perhaps she needs some professional help?

Twitter / IvyKungu

"It's a tricky one."

Twitter / acarboni

"Are you he who can food us?"

Twitter / cd_hooks

The jokes only got more over-the-top from there.

"A modern tragedy."

Twitter / XiranJayZhao

"They/them pronouns have long been used to address someone whose pronouns you don't know."

Twitter / IfyNwadiwe

What's your take on this one? Do you think Saad's wife was being a little ridiculous for reacting the way she did, or do you think it's entirely understandable?

In a world where there is so much diversity, surely the most important thing is that we treat each other with dignity and respect. Knowledge and understanding may take time, but if the effort is being made, it speaks volumes.

We would love to hear your opinions on this topic. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below.

Want more awkward social tension? Read what happened when she barely ate, then split the bill anyway with her broke friend.