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Woman Asks For Best Way To Tell Her Obese Husband That She No Longer Finds Him Attractive

"I don't want to destroy his self-confidence"

Woman Asks For Best Way To Tell Her Obese Husband That She No Longer Finds Him Attractive

When a relationship is new, you and your partner likely experience a great deal of passion, chemistry, and attraction, and those feelings often intensify over time. Perhaps your initial attraction to your partner stemmed from their appearance, and as you got to know them and their quirks, your attraction grew even stronger.

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Although attraction may fluctuate over time, some individuals would actually end the relationship if they suddenly find themselves unattracted to their partner. A shift in perspective regarding your partner may compel you to make a challenging decision for your relationship.

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However, there are several factors to consider before making that decision. The OP of today's story no longer finds her husband attractive, so let's delve into the story and discover why.

The 30-year-old OP met her 30-year-old husband when they were both 22, and they have been married for two years now. The OP no longer finds him attractive because he has gained a significant amount of weight.

He previously weighed 80 kg but has now reached 120 kg over the last four to five years. Sometimes, he asks the OP to compliment him in the same way he does her, and she simply can't.

The OP doesn't want to destroy his self-confidence by telling him that she no longer finds him attractive. Therefore, she came online to seek advice.

The Headline

The HeadlineReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance
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The OP Never Told Him About the Hit Her Sexual Desire for Him Suffered

The OP Never Told Him About the Hit Her Sexual Desire for Him SufferedReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance
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Understanding Attraction Dynamics

The dynamics of attraction in romantic relationships can be complex and are often influenced by both physical and emotional factors. Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology highlights that attraction is not solely based on physical appearance but also on emotional connection and shared experiences. When one partner undergoes significant changes, such as weight gain, it can alter the perception of the relationship and impact emotional intimacy.

Moreover, feelings of attraction can fluctuate based on the individual's current mental state and overall life circumstances. This psychological perspective helps frame the husband's situation not just as a physical issue but as a relational one, where emotional support and communication play critical roles.

Let's Head into the Comments Section and Find Out What Other Redditors Have to Say Regarding the Story

Let's Head into the Comments Section and Find Out What Other Redditors Have to Say Regarding the StoryReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

It's a Very Difficult Situation

It's a Very Difficult SituationReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

Addressing issues of attraction requires sensitivity and understanding from both partners. Studies show that open communication about feelings can enhance emotional intimacy, which is vital for maintaining attraction. Couples therapy can be an effective way to navigate these discussions safely, as it provides a structured environment for dialogue.

Practical strategies include using 'I' statements to express feelings without placing blame, such as saying, 'I feel disconnected when we don't engage in activities together anymore.' This approach fosters a collaborative atmosphere for discussing sensitive topics.

Don't Try to Deny Reality

Don't Try to Deny RealityReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

Becoming More Proactive About Exercise

Becoming More Proactive About ExerciseReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

Nothing compares to the passion you experience in a new relationship; that time when you are so enamored with your partner that you can't resist touching them. It's fairly typical for some people to lose interest in a relationship when the novelty wears off and desire decreases over time.

However, for some, sexual attraction can completely vanish, and it can be difficult to overcome. Is this typical, though, and is a relationship worth ending because of this?

Well, let's keep scrolling to find out more from Redditors.

Few People Look How They Did at 22

Few People Look How They Did at 22Reddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

You Are Getting Fat and It's a Turn Off

You Are Getting Fat and It's a Turn OffReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

The Role of Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is a crucial factor in how individuals perceive themselves and their partners. According to research by Dr. Nathaniel Branden, self-esteem impacts not only personal well-being but also the dynamics of close relationships. When one partner feels unattractive or less valued, it can lead to withdrawal and resentment, creating a cycle that further diminishes attraction.

Addressing self-esteem issues is vital, as fostering a positive self-image can contribute to healthier interactions. Couples can support each other through affirmations and shared experiences that build each other's self-esteem, reinforcing the bond between them.

The OP Can Help Him Get Back in Shape If She Loves Him

The OP Can Help Him Get Back in Shape If She Loves HimReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

The OP Will Have Her Answers Based on His Response

The OP Will Have Her Answers Based on His ResponseReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

In the early stages of a relationship, there is often a great deal of passion between partners; they want to spend every waking moment together, both in and out of the bedroom. It consumes everything. However, that kind of intense attraction usually wanes over time.

Some Redditors suggest that OP's husband knows she finds him less attractive, but he desperately needs her to reassure him that she's still into him. She was advised to continue reassuring him that she loves him and to help him stick to a healthy routine.

Telling Him That He's No Longer Attractive

Telling Him That He's No Longer AttractiveReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

Seeing You Get More and More Unhealthy Is a Turn Off

Seeing You Get More and More Unhealthy Is a Turn OffReddit/ThrowRA_lastchance

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the delicate balance between physical attraction and emotional connection within romantic relationships. It's essential for partners to communicate their feelings openly while being mindful of each other's vulnerabilities. Addressing these concerns with empathy can pave the way for deeper understanding and ultimately strengthen the relationship.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, navigating attraction in a relationship is a multi-faceted issue that requires patience and understanding. As Dr. Esther Perel, a renowned couples therapist, states, "Desire is not a given; it has to be cultivated." Open communication, support, and mutual respect are essential components in fostering attraction and intimacy in relationships. According to Dr. Eli Finkel, a relationship researcher, "Couples who engage in honest conversations about their feelings and desires tend to have stronger connections." As couples work through these challenges together, they can emerge stronger and more connected.

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