Woman Asks For Best Way To Tell Her Obese Husband That She No Longer Finds Him Attractive

A 28-year-old woman is asking Reddit for the “best way” to tell her obese husband that she no longer finds him attractive, and the post is already a minefield. It’s not just about looks either, because this couple is tangled up in years of being together, the kind of routine that makes attraction quietly shift, and a conversation that could flip their whole relationship on its head.

In the story, the complication is that she is trying to be honest without crushing him, while he likely believes everything is fine, at least on the surface. Add in the fact that her desire has changed over time, and you’ve got a situation where timing, wording, and what she does next all matter.

And once you see how Redditors react to the weight-gain angle, you realize this isn’t just a relationship question, it’s a “how do you say it without wrecking the person” question, too.

The Headline

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The OP Never Told Him About the Hit Her Sexual Desire for Him Suffered

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The dynamics of attraction in romantic relationships can be complex and are often influenced by both physical and emotional factors. Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology highlights that attraction is not solely based on physical appearance but also on emotional connection and shared experiences. When one partner undergoes significant changes, such as weight gain, it can alter the perception of the relationship and impact emotional intimacy.

Moreover, feelings of attraction can fluctuate based on the individual's current mental state and overall life circumstances. This psychological perspective helps frame the husband's situation not just as a physical issue but as a relational one, where emotional support and communication play critical roles.

Let's Head into the Comments Section and Find Out What Other Redditors Have to Say Regarding the Story

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It's a Very Difficult Situation

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The headline makes it sound like a simple honesty problem, but the OP’s silence about how her desire changed is where the real tension starts.

Addressing issues of attraction requires sensitivity and understanding from both partners.

Don't Try to Deny Reality

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Becoming More Proactive About Exercise

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The comments immediately split, with some saying she should be proactive about exercise, while others call it a turn-off and bluntly refuse to sugarcoat it.

And it gets messy in a different way with the woman fighting her partner’s cat allergy while insisting on keeping Luna.

Nothing compares to the passion you experience in a new relationship; that time when you are so enamored with your partner that you can't resist touching them. It's fairly typical for some people to lose interest in a relationship when the novelty wears off and desire decreases over time.

However, for some, sexual attraction can completely vanish, and it can be difficult to overcome. Is this typical, though, and is a relationship worth ending because of this?

Well, let's keep scrolling to find out more from Redditors.

Few People Look How They Did at 22

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You Are Getting Fat and It's a Turn Off

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The “don’t try to deny reality” crowd pushes back hard, especially when the story hints that attraction can vanish completely, not just fade a little.

Self-esteem is a crucial factor in how individuals perceive themselves and their partners.

The OP Can Help Him Get Back in Shape If She Loves Him

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The OP Will Have Her Answers Based on His Response

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Even the “he’ll have her answers based on his response” line hits differently once you remember this is about telling him directly, not letting the topic drift at a family dinner level of awkward.

In the early stages of a relationship, there is often a great deal of passion between partners; they want to spend every waking moment together, both in and out of the bedroom. It consumes everything. However, that kind of intense attraction usually wanes over time.

Some Redditors suggest that OP's husband knows she finds him less attractive, but he desperately needs her to reassure him that she's still into him. She was advised to continue reassuring him that she loves him and to help him stick to a healthy routine.

Telling Him That He's No Longer Attractive

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Seeing You Get More and More Unhealthy Is a Turn Off

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Navigating attraction within a relationship is a complex challenge that demands both patience and understanding.

Now he’s stuck wondering whether the real issue is his body, or the fact that she stopped wanting him long before she spoke up.

For a similar “love vs health” blowup, see whether she was wrong for adopting a pet that triggered her allergic husband’s chaos: Am I Wrong for Adopting a Pet That Triggered My Partners Severe Allergies?.