Woman Tells Her Son's Underweight GF That She Should Stop Eating Like A Bird, Son Gets Angry And Calls Her A Bitch
"I didn’t think the comment was insensitive; I was just worried about her, and to be fair, my comparison wasn’t too far off."
An individual may face just as many health risks if they are underweight as they do if they are overweight. A person's body might not be receiving the nutrition it needs to develop strong bones, skin, and hair if they are underweight.
There are measures that doctors can suggest to help a person gain weight, even if some individuals may not be able to do so due to genetics or a medical condition. Both being overweight and being underweight can lead to health issues.
Not everyone who is underweight experiences negative side effects or symptoms as a result of their weight loss. However, there are many healthy weight-gain options available to those who are underweight.
The OP in today's AITA story is a full-time chef and the proud mother of four boys. Her oldest son has been dating this girl for about a year, but the issue is that she's very insecure about her appearance, especially her figure.
According to the OP, she is underweight—enough that you can clearly see her bones poking in certain places—and she rarely eats. The OP tries to encourage her to eat more, but she always declines, saying she wasn’t hungry and that she didn’t need to gain more weight.
The OP had enough and told her to stop eating like a bird, which shocked the girl and angered her son. Keep reading to find out how the story unfolded.
OP writes:
RedditMy oldest still lives with me as he’s saving for his own apartment
RedditI finally had enough and told her that this wasn’t okay
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The Intersection of Concern and Communication
This situation underscores the complexities of communication within family dynamics. According to Dr. Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of Nonviolent Communication, expressing concern for a loved one's well-being is crucial, but the manner in which it is conveyed can significantly impact how it is received.
In this case, the mother's choice of words may have unintentionally triggered defensiveness in her son's girlfriend, leading to conflict rather than concern.
I was just worried about her, and to be fair, my comparison wasn’t too far off
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And the comments from redditors roll in...
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Before you do anything, apologize to her
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Communication styles can vary widely, and understanding these differences is essential for fostering healthy dialogues. Research indicates that individuals with different communication styles may misinterpret intentions, leading to unnecessary conflict.
By discussing these differences openly, family members can enhance their understanding and reduce the likelihood of misunderstandings.
You know she's insecure
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There are more polite ways to go about it
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You can calmly explain your reasoning after you've apologized
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Navigating Sensitivity in Conversations
Dr. Brené Brown emphasizes the importance of vulnerability in communication, particularly when discussing sensitive topics. Her research suggests that approaching conversations with empathy and openness can foster a sense of safety and trust.
Being mindful of how concerns are expressed can help family members navigate sensitive discussions more effectively, promoting understanding and connection.
You made a comment about how much she eats
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Trust that your son cares for her
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I know you meant to be helpful
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Recognizing the impact of emotional triggers in conversations can lead to healthier interactions. Research shows that when individuals are aware of their emotional triggers, they can engage in more constructive dialogues and avoid escalating conflicts.
By practicing self-awareness and emotional regulation, family members can communicate their concerns without triggering defensiveness in others.
No need to check notes
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There is an age gap there
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She won't eat if she isn't comfortable
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More importantly, you are not her doctor
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The OP went ahead to voice her own verdict on her own post
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Do not talk about possible eating problems during mealtime
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Now she'll also struggle more to eat
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The road to hell is paved with good intentions
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Your son has more of a place to be concerned
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You publicly shamed her at the dinner table
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You need to step back
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You sound overbearing
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The OP added an edit later on, and here it is
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Why the OP needed to voice her concerns
A person with body dysmorphic disorder (BDD), also known as body dysmorphia, spends a lot of time fretting about flaws in their appearance. Others frequently overlook these flaws.
BDD can affect people of any age, but it's most prevalent in adolescents and young adults. The OP only wanted to help, but I guess she went about it the wrong way.
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Psychological Analysis
Our in-house psychologist notes that the mother's comment may reflect well-intentioned concern, but the delivery can significantly impact how it is received.
Encouraging family discussions about communication styles can help foster understanding and reduce misunderstandings.
Analysis generated by AI
Analysis & Alternative Approaches
Effective communication is critical in navigating family dynamics and ensuring concerns are expressed appropriately.
Psychologists emphasize the importance of empathy and self-awareness in fostering healthy family relationships.
By promoting open dialogues about concerns, family members can enhance understanding and reduce the likelihood of conflict.