Full-Time Nanny Waits Until Morning To Answer Employers About Her Availability For The Day, Wonders Why They Are Mad

A 28-year-old nanny got hit with a cold, told the family she could not work the next day, and thought that was the end of it. Then the parents asked about Tuesday, and the whole thing spiraled over something as small as timing.

The complication is petty but real: the message about Tuesday came in outside her working hours, so she didn’t respond right away. Instead, she answered the next morning, and that’s when the employers started criticizing her for not letting them know earlier, like she was sitting on the information.

Now the question is not whether she was sick, it’s whether her “morning reply” was disrespectful or just her protecting her own boundaries.

Here is the OP's dilemma:

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The OP caught a cold and informed the family that she would not be able to work the next day:

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Tomorrow, they asked her if she'd work on Tuesday, but she ignored their message as it was sent outside of her working hours:

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In the realm of childcare, professional boundaries play a crucial role in defining the employer-nanny relationship.

She answered them the next day, and they criticized her for not informing them earlier:

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The OP should have informed them earlier

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The parents might start looking for another babysitter

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The OP already told them she had a cold, but the parents still followed up about Tuesday the moment that Monday clock ran past her usual hours.

By establishing expectations around communication and availability, employees can better manage their workloads and reduce stress.

In this case, the nanny's decision to respond outside of working hours may reflect a desire to protect her personal time, which is a valid approach.

Another Redditor said they must be looking already

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She was being disrespectful to the family

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The business hours rule doesn’t even make sense in this scenario

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Instead of replying right away to that off-hours text, she waited until morning, and that single delay is what lit the fuse.

This is similar to when the friend accused the pet sitter of neglecting her dog, and Reddit debated whether she was wrong to refuse.

Encouraging open dialogue about working hours and communication preferences can lead to improved relationships between employees and employers.

It was the OP's responsibility to inform them during 'business hours'

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She should have texted them earlier on Monday

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That's the most likely scenario

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The family came back swinging with the “you should have informed us earlier” complaint, even though the Tuesday question arrived outside her working window.

To enhance communication and establish boundaries, it may be helpful for both parties to agree on specific times for communication. For example, setting designated hours for work-related discussions can alleviate pressure and help maintain a healthier work-life balance.

Additionally, utilizing tools like shared calendars or scheduling apps can facilitate better coordination and respect for each other's time.

The family needed to be informed

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"YTA for not letting them know until Tuesday morning"

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"The morning of is pretty last minute"

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By the time she finally responded Tuesday morning, the parents were treating her like she was being disrespectful, not sick and busy.

In the realm of childcare, the dynamics between nannies and their employers can significantly influence day-to-day interactions.

"This is not a conventional job where there is backup"

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Redditors unanimously agreed that the OP was definitely in the wrong for not responding to the family's message right away. It was her responsibility to inform them regardless.

And if she cares about business hours so much, she should have let them know earlier on Monday. This way, she is being extremely disrespectful and rude towards the family.

Encouraging a culture of respect and understanding can help navigate these complexities. Establishing ground rules for communication can create a safer environment for expressing needs and concerns, ultimately leading to healthier workplace relationships.

In this situation, it’s essential to focus on finding common ground and ensuring that both parties feel heard and respected.

The situation with the full-time nanny highlights the importance of establishing and respecting professional boundaries in domestic employment.

The family might be mad about a late text, but the OP is probably wondering why they want her availability on their schedule, not hers.

For another boundary clash, see if you’re the jerk for choosing hiking over cat-sitting and letting your friend down. Choosing Hiking Over Cat-Sitting, WIBTA.