High School Student Scolded By Mom For Wearing Stepmom's Kimono To The Prom, Online Community Thinks Mom Is Just Jelly

Donning traditional attire from a foreign culture within one's home country poses a delicate challenge. In today's era of instant social media sharing, individuals showcasing such clothing may unwittingly become targets of criticism and negativity simply for their choice of attire.

They may face accusations of cultural appropriation, a term that refers to the adoption of specific elements from another culture for personal gain or interest. Generally speaking, as long as you follow cultural sensitivity and approach cross-cultural appreciation with respect, the potential backlash can be mitigated.

Nevertheless, you need to tread carefully because there will inevitably be individuals who staunchly oppose the idea of people donning traditional costumes at certain events, regardless of whether the attire is worn correctly. This sentiment is reflected in today's story from the Am I The A**hole (AITA) subreddit, serving as one such example.

The original poster (OP) asked the community if she was wrong for wearing a kimono during prom. She tells users that when she was about to wear the red dress she bought, her stepmom pulled her aside and offered her a kimono.

The OP thought the dress was beautiful, so she obliged. After the event, when it was finally time to look at the photos, her mom saw them and wasn't happy.

The OP was then questioned by her mom about her choice. An argument ensued, resulting in her being grounded.

She then asked a friend whether wearing a kimono was acceptable, only to encounter yet another disapproving reception.

The OP was offered a kimono by her stepmom and she agreed to wear it.

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OP's mom saw her pictures and wasn't too happy.

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Redditors believe that while it angered her mom and her friend didn't have a warm reaction to what she did, she isn't necessarily in the wrong.

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Navigating Cultural Identity in Adolescents

The situation highlights the complexities of cultural identity, particularly during formative years like adolescence. Dr. Daphna Oyserman, a psychologist specializing in identity, explains that cultural attire can be a powerful expression of identity and belonging. The teenager's choice to wear her stepmother's kimono reflects a desire to connect with her cultural heritage, which can often be a source of pride.

Research shows that adolescents who embrace their cultural identity tend to experience higher self-esteem and resilience, making it essential to support these expressions rather than discourage them.

Given that the prom is a formal event, and considering that kimonos are traditionally worn for such occasions, her choice was entirely appropriate.

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If this were from the perspective of a Japanese person, they wouldn't mind. In fact, people from that country would encourage it.

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A Japanese person living outside their own country shared their take on the situation and cultural appropriation.

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Studies published in the Journal of Youth and Adolescence indicate that cultural pride can significantly influence social interactions and peer relationships during high school. The criticism the teenager received may stem from peers who are not familiar with or do not appreciate cultural diversity, which can create feelings of isolation or misunderstanding.

The mom's reaction came from a place of jealousy. It wasn't necessarily because it was culturally inappropriate.

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A person who took kimono classes tells the OP that she isn't the a-hole for wearing it to the prom. Her mom is just jealous.

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It was offered to her and she agreed to wear it. No issue there.

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Fostering Cultural Understanding

Encouraging family discussions about cultural attire can foster understanding and appreciation among family members. Dr. Patricia G. Devine, a social psychologist, emphasizes that promoting awareness of cultural diversity can lead to more inclusive attitudes. This can help bridge gaps between generations and mitigate feelings of jealousy or misunderstanding within the family.

It would only be inappropriate if she wore it to achieve an exotic Asian look.

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There's nothing wrong with the OP wearing the kimono to her prom. She was never culturally inappropriate, especially since it was an offer from a Japanese person.

The Redditors are probably right. Her mom's attitude after she looked at the prom pictures was off — it seemed like jealousy, especially since the OP was offered something that special.

It's disheartening that the enjoyable experience was overshadowed by her mom's attitude in the end. However, let's hope that the OP and her mom can find a solution to this issue.

Furthermore, creating a supportive environment for cultural expression can enhance the teenager's confidence and sense of belonging. Engaging in community events that celebrate diverse cultures can provide opportunities for the teenager to connect with others who share similar experiences and values.

Psychological Analysis

This situation underscores the challenges adolescents face in expressing their cultural identity. Supporting their choices and fostering open dialogue can empower them during this critical developmental stage, helping them navigate cultural complexities with confidence.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In summary, navigating cultural identity is essential for adolescents as they develop a sense of self. Research emphasizes the importance of supporting cultural expressions to foster resilience and self-esteem. By encouraging open discussions and celebrating diversity, families can create environments that promote understanding and acceptance.