AITA for Adjusting Rent Unfairly Due to Roommate's Financial Situation?

A 28-year-old woman refused to keep paying 50/50 rent when her roommate, Alex, started falling behind after getting laid off. At first, it sounded like a decent, practical fix: she suggested a 60/40 split based on income so he could catch up without drowning.

But then the whole thing got messy. Alex agreed to pay 40% while he was unemployed, and she covered more because his savings were shrinking and he had already been late a couple times. The complication? He landed a better job, got a higher salary, and never told her, so she only found out by overhearing him on a work call.

Now she has to decide whether to confront him and renegotiate back to 50/50, or keep honoring the 60/40 deal he already benefited from.

Original Post

So I'm (28F) currently living with my roommate (25M), let's call him Alex, in a two-bedroom apartment in the city. We've been splitting the rent 50/50 since we moved in together a year ago.

Recently, Alex lost his job due to layoffs and has been struggling financially. His savings are running low, and he's been late on rent a couple of times.

For background, I work a stable job and have enough savings to cover my expenses comfortably. I suggested to Alex that we split the rent proportionally based on our incomes to help him out during this tough time.

I proposed a 60/40 split where I pay 60% of the rent and he pays 40%. Alex was hesitant at first but eventually agreed, acknowledging that it would ease his financial burden.

However, after a couple of months of this arrangement, Alex got a new job with a higher salary than before. He didn't inform me about the job offer or the salary increase.

I only found out when I overheard him on a work call discussing his new position. I felt a bit blindsided that he didn't disclose this to me, especially since we had adjusted the rent split to support him when he was struggling.

Now, I'm torn. Should I confront Alex about his new job and renegotiate the rent split back to 50/50 since he's in a better financial position now?

Or should I stick to our agreed-upon 60/40 split for a while longer to allow him to build up his savings? I genuinely want to support him, but I also feel a bit taken advantage of by his lack of transparency.

So, AITA?

The adjustment of the rent split due to a roommate's undisclosed financial situation raises critical questions about transparency and trust in shared living arrangements. Research from the University of Virginia emphasizes that a lack of transparency around finances can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts. When one party feels that information has been withheld, it can create feelings of betrayal and mistrust, complicating the roommate dynamic.

Understanding the psychological impact of financial secrecy is crucial for fostering a healthy roommate relationship, as it can significantly affect mutual respect and cooperation.

Comment from u/banana_lover99

Comment from u/butterfly_dreamer

When OP watched Alex go from late payments to “eventually agreed” to 60/40, it felt like the kind of roommate compromise that keeps peace in a two-bedroom apartment.

This scenario also highlights the psychological aspect of financial privilege and how it can create imbalances in relationships. A study published in the

She might be paying extra rent for a kindness that stopped being shared the moment Alex got that raise.

Want a bigger landlord-tenant blowup? See what a former tenant did after refusing a $5000 flood repair bill.