Am I Wrong for Not Allowing My Friends Puppy to Stay Over?

A 27-year-old woman refused to let her friend’s new puppy stay over, and it turned into a guilt trip fast. Her reasoning was simple: she works from home full-time, she already has a shy cat named Mittens, and the last time the puppy came over, Mittens hid under the bed for hours like she was bracing for impact.

Sarah, 26, had an erratic work schedule and asked for a couple weekday days of puppy babysitting. So OP tried to be honest, offered help finding doggy daycare or a sitter, and still ended up feeling like the bad guy.

Now the question is whether OP’s boundaries were fair, or if Sarah is right to be disappointed.

Original Post

I (27F) have a close friend, let's call her Sarah (26F), who recently got a new puppy. Research schedule is quite erratic, so she asked if her puppy could stay at my house a couple of days a week while she's at work.

For background, I work from home full-time and have a cat, Mittens. Mittens is very shy around other animals and gets stressed easily.

When Sarah brought her puppy to visit one day, Mittens hid under the bed for hours. I could see how anxious Mittens was, and I had to keep the puppy in a separate room the whole time.

Sarah asked if the puppy could stay over during weekdays, but I explained my concerns about Mittens. Sarah suggested I keep Mittens in a different room, but Mittens hates closed doors and becomes distressed when separated.

I feel responsible for Mittens' well-being, and I don't want her to be stressed out in her own home. I told Sarah that I couldn't have the puppy stay over but offered to help find a dog sitter or daycare nearby.

Sarah seemed understanding at first but later expressed disappointment, saying she couldn't afford doggy daycare every day. I felt guilty, but I also want what's best for Mittens.

So, Reddit, am I the a*****e for refusing to let Sarah's puppy stay at my house, even though it puts her in a tough spot with dog care?

Introducing a new pet into a home can be challenging, especially for sensitive animals like Mittens. Cats often display anxiety when faced with unfamiliar companions, which can manifest as stress-related behaviors. This method not only helps ease the cat's anxiety but also allows the puppy to acclimate to its new surroundings.

Such a gradual approach can foster a more harmonious environment that respects the needs of both animals.

Comment from u/spaghetti_monster88

Comment from u/tigerstripes22

Comment from u/banana_sundae2000

The puppy visit was supposed to be a quick test, but Mittens hid under the bed for hours, so OP realized this was not a “just get over it” situation.

Communication is key in situations like this.

Comment from u/sushi_lover76

It echoes the AITA about considering breaking up over financial irresponsibility, when money values start driving distance.

Comment from u/chocolate_chip_cookie

Comment from u/icecreamdream11

Comment from u/pizzaoverload123

Comment from u/popcornlover555

Comment from u/moondance87

Sarah’s workaround, “keep Mittens in another room,” fell apart the moment OP explained that Mittens gets distressed with closed doors.

OP offered to help Sarah find dog care nearby, but the disappointment hit when Sarah said she could not afford doggy daycare every day.

With Sarah’s schedule still messy and Mittens still stressed, OP is left wondering if she is the a*****e for saying no to the puppy stays.

Just as couples navigate their emotional landscapes, pet owners must ensure that their pets feel secure, especially during times of change. This approach can enhance comfort and reduce anxiety for all involved.

Comment from u/mountain_dew_fanatic

What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments.

The dilemma presented in the Reddit thread highlights the intricate dynamics of pet ownership, especially when it involves the well-being of different animals. By prioritizing discussions about boundaries and mutual concerns, pet owners can navigate these complexities while ensuring the emotional safety of all pets involved.

This case underscores the importance of respecting each animal's individual needs. Thoughtful planning and open dialogue can pave the way for a more harmonious coexistence, ultimately benefiting both the pets and their owners. Establishing these practices not only helps in resolving immediate issues but also strengthens the bonds of friendship amidst the challenges of pet care.

OP might be the one setting a hard boundary, but Mittens is the one who has to live with the stress.

Before you judge, read how one friend faced fallout after unsolicited parenting advice. Should I Have Given Parenting Advice to My Friend?