Woman Vows Never To Buy Gifts Again After SIL Shrugs Her $80 Present, But Husband Says She’s Overreacting
She tried to be thoughtful, and the silence did the talking.
The OP of this story explained that she has been married for three years and that her husband’s family does holidays big. They visit for Christmas and Easter, everyone gathers close, and the parents spend a lot on gifts, often $500 or more per child.
OP doesn’t live on that kind of budget, but she still tries to show up thoughtfully because the family clearly values nice presents.
This Christmas, OP bought her sister-in-law a gift worth around $80. She put together a Sephora package with makeup sponges and travel-size minis of the skincare brand her sister-in-law already uses, since she has a trip coming up in February.
OP also spent more on the parents, around $150 each, because they always give her generous gifts.
The problem is that OP’s sister-in-law doesn’t work and still studies, so she never buys OP anything. OP says she doesn’t even do a small gesture, which already creates a quiet imbalance.
Still, OP kept the peace and gave her a gift with good intentions. On receiving the gift, her sister-in-law smiled and said thanks, so OP assumed it landed fine.
Then the next day, OP noticed the items sitting out on the dining room counter in the common area. She asked about it casually, and her sister-in-law shrugged and said she would put it away later.
Three days passed, and the gift still sat there. OP also noticed something that stung more: it was the only gift left lying around.
When OP brought it up with her husband, he told her that his sister probably didn’t value the gift since it wasn't what she wanted. At this point, OP got upset and vowed not to get her any gifts in the future.
Scroll through the screenshots below to see how this small moment turned into a bigger fight about gratitude.
Let's dig into the details
Reddit.comOriginal post
Reddit.comOriginal post
Reddit.com
Original post
Reddit.com
Original post
Reddit.com
“Taking offense that she didn't put away the gift and saying that she therefore doesn't deserve gifts in the future is an overreaction.”
Reddit.com
“NTA, aside from what you feel is her gratitude, or lack thereof, the fact is, you're not really required to get anybody gifts.”
Reddit.com
“Stop being all but-hurt because she isn't fulfilling your expectations and not stroking your ego.”
Reddit.com
“NTA - although I agree with you, this isn't a situation where you'll win or even look good.”
Reddit.com
“Buying makeup or skincare/beauty stuff for someone else is really tricky. It's like buying someone a bra IMO.”
Reddit.com
“She thanked you for it and that is that. What do you want, a parade?”
Reddit.com
“I wouldn’t waste money on her again since she’s been ungrateful but also she’s never given a gift in return.”
Reddit.com
“Very slight yta... Not every gift is liked, that is life, that is why the day after Christmas return lines are huge.”
Reddit.com
The Reddit community has decided to side with OP's sister-in-law on this issue. Many people feel that a 'thank you' is sufficient to show gratitude.
Some people have even mentioned that leaving gifts around is a normal thing, and that gifts that are put away quickly are the ones that are not liked.
One particular Redditor chose to be neutal is giving a verdict, but noted that buying skincare products for someone could be tricky, especially if it's not their go-to brand.
Which side of the divide are you on? Or do you have a completely different opinion on this entire situation? Tell us in the comments.
