Dealing with a Coworkers Strong Cologne: Workplace Etiquette Advice

A 29-year-old woman says her coworker, Joe, shows up every single day smelling like a walking perfume commercial, and it’s starting to mess with her head and her work. Not in a “this is annoying” way, in a “I get headaches and can’t focus” way.

Joe is described as a nice guy, which is what makes it extra awkward. She’s tried telling him politely that she has sensitivities to strong scents, and he basically waves it off. Then comes the worst part, a client meeting where Joe’s cologne is so overpowering the client sneezes and comments on it, leaving the OP embarrassed and stuck wondering if she’s the one being unreasonable.

Now the real question is whether she should just swallow it, or push back when Joe’s “little perfume” is affecting everyone in the room.

Original Post

So I'm (29F) and I have this coworker, let's call him Joe. For background, Joe is a nice guy, but he wears an overwhelming amount of cologne every day.

I mean, it's like a cloud of perfume following him around the office. It's so strong that it gives me headaches and makes it hard for me to focus on my work.

Some important info here is that I've tried mentioning it politely to him, saying that I have sensitivities to strong scents, but he just laughs it off and says a little perfume never hurt anyone. The other day, we had an important meeting with a client, and Joe's cologne was so overpowering that the client actually sneezed and commented on it.

I was embarrassed by the situation. I don't want to come off as rude or cause a scene, but the constant smell is affecting my work environment.

AITA for not wanting to cover up Joe's excessive cologne at work? I honestly don't know if I'm wrong here or if I should just suck it up and deal with it.

The Fine Line of Professionalism

This situation really highlights the challenges of workplace etiquette. The OP describes Joe as a nice guy, which complicates things. It’s tough to confront someone whose personal habits are impacting your work environment, especially when they don’t seem to realize the issue. The fact that Joe's cologne is causing headaches and discomfort during client meetings raises serious questions about professionalism.

How do you address personal hygiene without coming off as rude? The OP’s dilemma resonates because it’s a common struggle; we all want to maintain a pleasant work atmosphere, but at what point does someone's self-expression become a burden on their colleagues?

The office already feels tense, because Joe’s “cloud of perfume” is turning everyday work into a headache waiting to happen.

Comment from u/SaltyPopcorn1

NTA - Your health should come first, and it's impacting your work productivity. Joe needs to be considerate of others in the workplace.

Comment from u/_CoffeeAddict_

That's such a tough situation. YTA if you don't address it professionally with your HR department or supervisor; it's affecting your work environment.

Comment from u/WanderlustDreamer22

It sucks that Joe dismisses your concerns. You're NTA for wanting a comfortable work environment. Maybe approach HR for some mediation?

Comment from u/cozymysterybooks

Joe's the AH here; wearing too much cologne to work is inconsiderate, especially after you've raised it with him. Your discomfort matters. NTA.

When the OP tried to be polite about her sensitivities, Joe laughed it off, like her pain was just part of the vibe.

Comment from u/SleepyPanda555

ESH - Joe for not toning down the cologne after your conversation, and you for not escalating this through HR channels. Workplace health matters.

Also, this is like the AITA fight over a partner’s smelly bathroom habits and the request to change them.

Comment from u/GardeningPassion84

NTA - Your well-being at work matters. Maybe have a heart-to-heart with Joe again, and if that doesn't work, bringing it up with HR could help.

Comment from u/SkyHigh87

YTA - You should directly address the issue with Joe again before involving HR. Maybe he doesn't realize how serious the impact is on you.

Then the client meeting hits, and the sneeze plus the comment makes it clear this isn’t only bothering the OP.

Comment from u/musiclover123

Oh, I feel your pain. NTA - Joe should be more understanding. Maybe suggest he uses a milder cologne or sprays it sparingly at work?

Comment from u/TeaAndCrumpets

NTA - Your comfort matters, but it's essential to handle this professionally. Maybe have a one-on-one talk with Joe and let him know how serious this is.

Comment from u/AdventureSeeker99

Joe needs to tone it down. NTA for wanting a breathable workspace. Maybe a polite yet firm reminder would do the trick before involving HR.

After Joe keeps showing up like nothing happened, the OP is left debating if she’s protecting her workspace or starting drama with a “nice guy.”

Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section.

Community Divided on Courtesy vs. Comfort

The Reddit community's reaction to this post reveals a fascinating split in perspectives around personal space and consideration.

Why This Story Matters

This story underscores the delicate balance between personal expression and communal comfort in a workplace.

The situation between the original poster and Joe illustrates the tension that arises when personal expression clashes with workplace norms. While Joe may see his cologne as a harmless form of self-expression, the overwhelming scent is causing significant discomfort for his coworker, leading to headaches and awkward moments in front of clients. This scenario highlights the ongoing struggle to balance individual preferences with the collective comfort of a shared work environment.

At this point, Joe might be the only one who doesn’t realize he’s ruining the meeting for everyone else.

For another office meltdown, see how someone handled a coworker’s disruptive pungent lunches.