Debating Whether to Share Grandmas Secret Pie Recipe for Baking Contest - WIBTA?

A 28-year-old woman refused to hand over her grandma’s secret pie recipe, and it turned into a whole family drama faster than you can preheat an oven. This pie is not just “good,” it’s basically a family heirloom, the kind that shows up at gatherings and makes everyone go quiet for the first bite.

Her cousin, 25, asked for the recipe because there’s a local baking contest, and she thought the pie could win. OP said no, not out of pettiness, but because the recipe was entrusted to her and her grandma’s tradition matters. Then the plot twist, OP sees the cousin entered a pie that looks suspiciously like that same recipe, and now the cousin wants OP’s help perfecting it.

Now OP has to decide whether helping her cousin is love, or betrayal of the grandma who handed it down.

Original Post

So I'm (28F) a huge fan of baking, and my grandma passed down this amazing pie recipe to me that I've been making for years. Everyone in my family loves it, and it's always been a special treat during family gatherings.

Well, recently, my cousin (25F) reached out to me, asking for the recipe. She mentioned that there's a local baking contest coming up, and she believes the pie could be a winner.

I was a bit hesitant because this recipe has been a family secret for generations, and my grandma entrusted it to me specifically. I politely declined, explaining the sentimental value and tradition behind the pie within our family.

My cousin seemed disappointed but accepted my decision. However, a few days later, I saw on social media that she had entered the contest with a pie that suspiciously resembled my grandma's recipe.

I felt betrayed and hurt that she went behind my back. Now, my cousin is asking me to help her perfect the recipe for the competition.

I'm torn between supporting her passion for baking and honoring my grandma's wish to keep the recipe within the family. So, WIBTA for not sharing my grandma's secret pie recipe with my cousin, even though she's determined to use it in the baking contest?

The Weight of Tradition

This story really highlights the emotional weight that family recipes carry. For the original poster, this pie recipe isn’t just about dessert; it’s a piece of her grandmother’s legacy. When her cousin wants to use it for a baking contest, it raises questions about ownership and the essence of family traditions. Is it a betrayal to keep it a secret, or is it a way to honor the memory of someone who cherished that recipe?

It’s a relatable conflict for many who have faced similar dilemmas where keeping traditions intact feels like a form of love, while sharing them can feel like diluting their significance. The cousin's eagerness to win might come off as competitive, but it’s also a reflection of how much these recipes mean to everyone involved. The emotional stakes are high here.

OP’s cousin asked for the recipe for the contest, and OP’s “no” was basically her protecting her grandma’s legacy.

Comment from u/muffinlover_86

NTA - Family recipes are sacred. Your cousin should respect that.

Comment from u/BakingQueen123

YTA - It's just a recipe. Let her pursue her passion for baking.

Comment from u/CinnamonRolls4eva

NTA - She should've respected your initial decision. Stand your ground on this.

Comment from u/Cookiemonster55

YTA - Sharing is caring, especially in a friendly baking competition.

Then OP spots the cousin’s entry on social media, and the pie looks too familiar to ignore.

Comment from u/PepperoniPizzaFanatic

NTA - Family traditions matter. Your cousin should find her own signature bake.

This debate is similar to the cousin showdown over whether to share grandma’s blueberrry pie recipe for a cousin’s bakery.

Comment from u/ButtercreamDreams

YTA - It's just a recipe. Don't let a contest come between family bonds.

Comment from u/VanillaSwirls77

NTA - Your cousin crossed a line by entering the contest without permission.

Now the cousin is back, asking OP to help her perfect the exact same recipe she already tried to take.

Comment from u/CaramelDelight98

YTA - It's a pie, not a state secret. Share the joy of baking with your cousin.

Comment from u/FlourPower_22

NTA - Your family, your rules. Treasure that recipe and don't feel pressured to share it.

Comment from u/ChocoChipCraze

YTA - Baking should bring people together, not cause rifts. Consider supporting your cousin's passion.

At the family gathering level, this isn’t just baking, it’s whether OP’s grandma’s trust gets respected or steamrolled for a prize.</p>

What are your thoughts on this situation? Share your perspective in the comments below.

A Family Divide

The reactions from the Reddit community show just how divided people can be over family loyalty versus personal pride. Some commenters might side with the OP, arguing that keeping the recipe a secret is a way to maintain a cherished family tradition. Others may see the cousin’s desire to participate in a baking contest as a valid reason to share the recipe.

This tension illustrates a broader issue: how we navigate familial relationships and competition. Is it selfish to guard a recipe that could bring joy and recognition to another family member? Or does sharing it risk losing something irreplaceable? It’s a real moral grey area, and the heated debates in the comments reflect the complexities of familial love and rivalry.

This story serves as a reminder of how recipes can symbolize more than just food; they represent family ties, memories, and traditions that shape our identities. As readers weigh in on the OP's dilemma, it’s fascinating to consider: how do you balance the desire to preserve family legacies with the urge to share and connect through those very traditions? What would you do in this situation?

What It Comes Down To

In this story, the original poster feels a deep sense of loyalty to her grandmother's secret pie recipe, which symbolizes not just culinary skill but a cherished family tradition. Her cousin's decision to enter a baking contest with a pie that resembles the family recipe feels like a betrayal, stirring up complex emotions around loyalty and competition. This conflict illustrates a familiar struggle many face: the tension between preserving personal legacies and fostering connections with family. The varying opinions in the Reddit comments highlight how subjective these familial dilemmas can be, as everyone weighs the importance of tradition against the joy of sharing.

OP might be willing to cheer her cousin on, but not if it means handing over grandma’s secret twice.

For the full family feud over refusing grandma’s secret Thanksgiving pie recipe to an entrepreneur cousin, read this.