Deciding to Skip Future Brother-in-Law’s Bachelor Trip: AITA?

AITAH debates skipping sister's fiancé's bachelor party due to moving in with girlfriend, unknown attendees, and lack of interest, despite parents offering to cover costs.

Damjan

Published in Interesting
5 Mar 2026

Deciding to Skip Future Brother-in-Law’s Bachelor Trip: AITA?

Brother-in-law bachelor trips sound fun in theory, until they land on the exact week your life is also on fire. In this Reddit post, a 27-year-old man is trying to be a good brother, a good partner, and a responsible adult at the same time.

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He’s already committed to being a groomsman for his sister’s wedding, which is a big deal. But when the groom’s bachelor party invitation comes in, the timing is brutal: the trip overlaps with his girlfriend’s lease ending, his own lease ending later that month, and their move-in plans. On top of that, it’s 4 days and 3 nights in several states over, with a cost around $700 to $800, and he doesn’t even know most of the guys going.

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Now he’s stuck between feeling guilty for saying no and knowing he can’t keep pretending the move-in can wait.

Original Post

I (27M) was asked to be a groomsman at my sister’s (22F) wedding. The gesture is super nice of them and I’m more than happy to be part of the wedding.

They asked me to go on the bachelors trip, which was also very nice of them, but the timing and cost is really difficult for me. The day of the trip is the day my girlfriend’s lease ends, and mine ends in the same month.

That’s when we’re trying to move in together, as well as furnish whatever place we find. Another side of it is that I don’t know the people going other than the groom, and they want to play golf and spend lots of money which I don’t have much interest in.

My parents offered to cover the costs for me after I mentioned the cost to them, but at the end of the day it’s just really bad timing and I honestly don’t want to go. AITAH for not going?

I haven’t given an answer yet because I feel guilty saying no, and know that she’ll hold resentment for me. But I feel like I need to prioritize my own life and make sure my affairs are in order.

I understand it’s a once in a lifetime thing, but I’m struggling to put my personal needs aside for it. Edit: I feel like I should also say the overall cost, and how many days.