Husband Asks If He's The A**hole For Saying Walking Their Dog Is A Chore

Time is one of the biggest commitments you must be willing to make when you get a dog because your pet will need a lot of it. They'll require you to walk them, play with them, bathe them, clean up their mess, feed them, and much more so they can live a long and happy life.

Even when just meeting their bare minimum needs, you need time. That's why when a couple or a family gets a dog, there's usually an agreement on dividing dog duties, which is only fair.

Because no matter how you see it and no matter how much you love your dog, parts of taking care of them are chores. They're a responsibility you must fulfill.

Unfortunately, some people have jobs that don't offer them much time at home. Sometimes, they have no choice but to work those jobs because of the pay they provide.

In these cases, it can be quite a dilemma, as in the case of Redditor Much-Advertising4243. He works 70+ hours a week with virtually no days off, and he still tries to manage his household duties, but his wife thinks he's not doing enough around the house.

Now, she has told him that he needs to walk the dog more, but he mentioned that it was a household chore and something he couldn't attend to. This has led to a full argument.

Here's the whole story.

OP asks:

Much-Advertising4243

OP's wife thinks he's not pulling his weight around the house

Much-Advertising4243

It has long been an issue, but OP can't see how he can improve given that if he works less, they might not be able to afford the house they live in

Much-Advertising4243

Work-Life Balance and Responsibilities

Balancing work and personal responsibilities is a significant challenge for many, particularly in demanding jobs.

Dr. Jennifer Collins, a workplace psychologist, explains that long working hours can lead to increased stress and resentment towards domestic tasks, such as walking the dog.

Her research highlights the importance of recognizing these feelings as valid rather than dismissing them as laziness.

OP feels that his wife isn't taking his schedule into consideration at all

Much-Advertising4243

Now, she's asking him to walk the dog more, and when he tried to refuse, she blew up

Much-Advertising4243

Working 70+ hours a week is almost the entire week, leaving just a few hours of sleep in between. That's a full schedule, and it's difficult to see where the husband can even find those extra few minutes to take the dog out.

It's not that he doesn't try to contribute as much as he can to the housework; it's just that he simply doesn't have the time and, we think, the energy to add more to his plate.

Many people in the comments section also agree. Some even say that if the wife wants him to contribute more at home, she should accept him working fewer hours and making less money.

Here are the top comments.

1. OP's points are right, but he needs a lifestyle change before he gets burned out

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According to studies published in the Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, individuals with high work demands often report low job satisfaction and higher levels of stress at home.

This can result in conflicts over household responsibilities, especially when one partner feels overwhelmed.

2. If she wants him to help out more at home, she should accept him working fewer hours and making less money

Left-Car6520

3. OP is already spending all his extra time with his family as it is

kenny_p0werz

4. If you love someone, you'd want to make their life easier

Talathia

The Emotional Toll of Caretaking

Caregiving responsibilities can often feel burdensome, particularly when one partner is overextended due to work demands.

Psychologists note that the emotional toll of feeling responsible for both work and home can lead to feelings of inadequacy and frustration.

Understanding this can help couples approach household responsibilities more collaboratively.

5. She should also understand that him working 70+ hours a week is no easy feat and will have consequences for him

confused-88

6. They might both be burnt out from their family roles and may need a mediator to come up with a solution

Nyxoltleee

7. They should look into other solutions rather than just him helping out more

JaxDax12

To enhance cooperation, experts recommend creating a shared responsibility chart that delineates roles and tasks.

Communication about workload and feelings can help partners understand each other's perspectives and reduce resentment.

Additionally, setting aside quality time together can strengthen relationships and alleviate stress.

8. She might be too frustrated to even notice how she's acting out

DisneyFoodie20

9. Her hours are really very few compared to his

inkyfang

10. Maybe the wife needs to reevaluate her attitude towards things at home

bathroomstallghost

Addressing Resentment in Relationships

Resentment can build in relationships when partners do not communicate effectively about their needs.

Research shows that open dialogue about feelings can help prevent misunderstandings and foster intimacy.

Therapists often suggest regular check-ins to discuss household dynamics and emotional well-being.

11. Looking for other solutions rather than just giving ultimatums would be great

KeyFly3

12. It seems that they're both trying to do their best for their parts, but they're just both burnt out from it

PhePheLaFrou

13. There's more to it than just walking the dog

UsuallyWrite2

14. Maybe switching places would do the trick

realityisrealyall

15. Some people think maybe the wife should step up more

Substantial_Day_1684

16. A fair division of labor

ko-ok-ko

17. Other factors might also be contributing to the stress in their marriage

Teacher-Investor

Being in their situation can be quite hard, especially since they're both trying to keep their home afloat in different ways. One is taking care of the finances while the other is managing the home.

As some of the comments have said, it might be that they're both getting burnt out from their roles in the household, which could be causing frustrations and stress. Hopefully, they will seek counseling so they can talk through it with a neutral party intervening.

And we hope this will provide them with the solutions or compromises they need to ease their tensions and live a happier and healthier life together.

Psychological Analysis

This situation exemplifies the challenges of balancing work and personal responsibilities.

It's essential for couples to communicate openly about their feelings and responsibilities to foster understanding and cooperation.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In conclusion, balancing work and home responsibilities is a common challenge that requires open communication and understanding.

Recognizing the emotional toll of caregiving responsibilities can enhance relationships and reduce resentment.

Through collaborative efforts, couples can navigate these dynamics more effectively.