From Twin Beds To Themed Threads - This Wedding Invitation Came With A Dress Code… And A Payment Plan

When Reddit user u/TripodGS_Mom found out her 62-year-old bio dad was getting married, she expected a few surprises — just not a full-blown financial obstacle course. With six months to go, every new wedding detail seems to add another reason to dread the big day.

The destination wedding falls on a Tuesday, because apparently, PTO is just a suggestion. Close family is expected to stay in a large Airbnb from Sunday through Tuesday, ringing in at about $500 per couple.

That price doesn’t even guarantee comfort, since most of the beds are twins and the OP and her fiancé are both tall. If they want privacy — and not to share a room with another couple — they may have to pay even more, despite cheaper hotels nearby.

Then there’s the theme. This isn’t a “wear something blue” situation; it’s full specialty costume territory.

Her dad’s fiancée has been sending Etsy links to custom outfits costing over $900 each. The OP doesn’t own anything remotely close, and these aren’t exactly pieces she’ll re-wear to brunch.

The reception? Not traditional. It’s at a restaurant, with one complimentary champagne toast, and guests must pay for their own meals.

To top it off, the couple’s registry is cash-only for their honeymoon. After tallying travel, lodging, outfits, and food, the OP is wondering if skipping a gift would make her the villain — especially since there’s no plated dinner to “cover.”

Is she wrong for feeling tapped out before the vows are even exchanged?

With six months to go, every new wedding detail seems to add another reason to dread the big day.

AI-generated image

Here’s the original post by Reddit user u/TripodGS_Mom.

My bio dad (M 62) is getting married to his girlfriend (F 48) in about 6 months, and every time I learn something new about this wedding, I dread it even more. Additionally, the financial implications of this wedding are starting to really stack up. Official wedding invitations came out today, but I have known details about the wedding for 3 weeks now. For starters, the wedding is a destination wedding and happens on a Tuesday. The plan is for close family to all stay in a large Airbnb for three days starting Sunday. For those three nights, it is about $500 per couple. My fiancé and I are very tall people, and the majority of the beds in this Airbnb are twin beds. It is not confirmed, but since I am not comfortable sharing a room with another couple, my fiancé and I may end up spending more for a private room. The thing is, I can get a decent hotel room for way cheaper, but the expectation is that we stay in this Airbnb. The wedding is themed and requires both myself and my fiancé to purchase specialty outfits to match the theme of the wedding. The theme is very specific, and the type of costumes we would be expected to wear is not something that I have. My dad’s girlfriend is sending me links to custom costumes from Etsy that are over $900. My bio dad and his fiancé are not doing a traditional reception. The reception is being held at a restaurant, and they are going to provide a single champagne toast, but guests are required to pay for themselves if they want to eat. For their registry, they are asking for cash for their honeymoon. For 6 months’ notice, this wedding is already extremely expensive for me and my fiancé to attend. I know traditionally the guide line for a wedding gift is whatever the cost of your plate is so since we are not being fed would it be okay to not give a gift? WIBTA?

Let’s see what the Reddit community had to say.

normanbeets

You don’t have to go.

dustyathome

Who are these people?

flCheesehead1

YWNBTA.

Used_Mark_7911

Just send them a gift you can afford.

fightingnflder

NTA.

Lunar-Eclipse0204

Sounds awful!

Odd-Worth7752

Your presence is a gift.

Interesting_Order_82

They’re not thinking straight.

Voice-of-Reason-ish

No way, don’t go!

katluvsbubbly

Maybe they don’t want any guests.

Ulquiorra1312

Just send them a card and be done with it.

Interesting-Client63

You’re already spending too much.

Falequeen

The OP wants to support her dad — she just doesn’t want to finance the entire celebration to do it.

With travel, costumes, and dinner already draining her wallet, she’s left wondering if showing up is gift enough — or if her card is expected to say “I do,” too.