Friends Baby Shower Snub: AITA for Skipping Event After Pregnancy Advice Criticism?

Some people don’t recognize a favor until it’s wrapped in baby shower invitations. In this Reddit post, a 30-year-old woman, OP, has been trying to support her close friend Sarah through her first pregnancy, offering tips from her own experience raising two kids.

But the “support” turns into something else fast. Sarah keeps seeking advice, then nitpicks it, questions OP’s methods, and makes OP feel like her parenting experience is up for debate. Now Sarah is planning her baby shower and hinting that OP should show up, even though OP is still smarting from the constant criticism and lack of appreciation.

So OP has to decide if skipping the shower is petty, or finally matching the energy she’s been getting.

Original Post

So, I'm a 30-year-old woman and a close friend of mine, let's call her Sarah, is expecting her first child. Ever since Sarah announced her pregnancy, she's been seeking a lot of pregnancy advice from me.

I've always tried to be supportive and helpful, sharing my experiences and tips. However, Sarah has been quite critical of the advice I've given her, constantly questioning my suggestions and methods.

For background, I have two kids of my own, and I like to think I've done a pretty good job raising them. So when Sarah disregarded my advice and seemed to belittle my experiences, it really rubbed me the wrong way.

Fast forward to now, Sarah is planning her baby shower, and she's been hinting at me to attend. However, after all the criticism and lack of appreciation for my help, I'm hesitant to join the celebration.

I feel like if she can't value the advice I've given her, why should I be there to support her at such a significant event in her life? I've been contemplating whether I should just suck it up and go to her baby shower to maintain our friendship or if I'm justified in skipping it due to feeling unappreciated.

So, AITA?

In this case, the tension stems from Sarah’s criticism of the OP’s pregnancy advice, which is a pretty loaded issue. It’s hard not to feel defensive when someone you care about questions your experience, especially in such a vulnerable area like parenting. The OP, having raised two kids, likely felt they were providing supportive guidance, only to be met with skepticism. That’s a tough pill to swallow.

This kind of dynamic can be common among friends, where one person’s well-intentioned advice can come off as condescending instead of supportive. It raises an important question: where's the line between sharing wisdom and overstepping boundaries?

Comment from u/PancakePrincess24

Comment from u/GamerDude7890

Comment from u/stargazer777

OP’s been giving Sarah pregnancy advice since the announcement, only for Sarah to treat every suggestion like it needs corrections.

The Baby Shower Dilemma

Skipping the baby shower is a bold move, and it shows just how deep the hurt runs. For the OP, attending might have felt like endorsing Sarah’s dismissive attitude toward their experience. The emotional stakes are high here. A baby shower is supposed to be a celebration, but when it’s marred by conflict, it can feel more like a battleground.

Readers can relate to this conflict because it taps into the universal experience of feeling unappreciated by someone you consider a friend. The OP’s decision to sit this one out also illustrates how friendships can become complicated in critical life moments.

Comment from u/JadedJellybean

Comment from u/coffee_lover93

Comment from u/nostalgic_noodle

It gets personal when Sarah disregards OP’s experience with two kids, questioning her “tips and methods” like they’re wrong on purpose.

It’s like the AITA poster who skipped a baby shower gift over disapproved parenting choices, and still got dragged.

Now that Sarah is planning the baby shower, the same friend who criticized OP’s advice is acting like OP’s presence is a given.

Community Reactions: Divided Opinions

The community's split reaction to the OP's dilemma highlights the complexity of friendship dynamics. Some readers supported the OP's choice to skip the event, emphasizing that it’s okay to prioritize self-respect over obligation. Others argued that the OP should have attended despite the criticism, suggesting that friendship sometimes requires swallowing your pride.

This division reflects a broader discussion about how to handle conflict in friendships. Should you always show up to support your friends, even if you feel slighted? Or is it more important to protect your own mental health and boundaries?

Comment from u/TheRealPancake

Comment from u/MoonlightMelody44

Comment from u/mellow_muffin

OP is stuck between sucking it up for the party or skipping it because her help never felt valued, just challenged.

The Weight of Experience

What stands out in this story is how the OP’s experience as a parent is both a strength and a point of contention. On one hand, they have valuable insights to share, but on the other, those insights might not resonate with someone new to motherhood. Sarah's reaction may stem from feeling overwhelmed and wanting to assert her independence as a new parent.

This tension is common: seasoned parents often want to share their wisdom, but it can come off as judgment when the recipient isn’t ready to accept it. This situation serves as a reminder that parenting is as much about support as it is about understanding different perspectives.

Comment from u/mega_bean

What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments.

This story resonates because it captures the often messy intersection of friendship and personal growth during major life changes. How do you balance giving advice with respecting someone’s journey? This dilemma isn’t just about skipping a baby shower; it’s about understanding and valuing different phases of life. What do you think? Should the OP have gone to the shower, or was skipping it a justified stance?

OP might not be the bad guy for skipping a baby shower where she was only ever tolerated.

Before you decide on Sarah’s baby shower, read the self-care debate in Should I Skip My Friends Baby Shower? Balancing Friendship and Personal Needs.