Redditor Receives Inheritance From Uncle But Decides To Lie To Gambler Mom About It, Now Feels Guilty

```html

Gambling can stimulate the brain's reward system in a manner similar to drugs or alcohol, which can lead to addiction. According to Dr. Rick Hanson, a neuropsychologist, "The brain's reward system can become hijacked by the thrill of gambling, making it hard for individuals to stop even when they face devastating losses." If you have a problem with compulsive gambling, you may find yourself chasing bets that lead to financial ruin, depleting savings, and incurring debt.

Compulsive gambling is a serious condition that can destroy lives. While treating compulsive gambling can be challenging, many individuals have found help through professional treatment. Dr. Brené Brown, a vulnerability researcher, emphasizes that "acknowledging the problem and seeking help is a vital step toward recovery and rebuilding one's life."

OP's mom has a history of gambling, drinking, and borrowing money from unethical sources. Years ago, she won $12,000 from the lottery and squandered it all.

OP's single uncle on their father's side has just passed away, and OP is set to receive a portion of what he left behind. This inheritance will help support OP through graduate school.

After the funeral, the first thing OP's mom asked about was the uncle's inheritance. She didn't even inquire about how OP was coping, and since their uncle was single, she assumed it had to go to someone.

OP had to lie, claiming that they didn't receive it, and the same goes for their dad. In fact, OP told her that the late uncle had chosen to give it to his other sibling.

Now, OP is feeling guilty for lying because that's not how they were raised. OP turned to the Reddit community for reassurance, and the full story is detailed below. ```

The Headline

Reddit/aiden_20

OP's Single Uncle Just Died

Reddit/aiden_20

The Weight of Guilt

Dr. Thomas Alder, a clinical psychologist, explains that feelings of guilt associated with financial matters often stem from unresolved family dynamics.

Research shows that when individuals inherit money, it can trigger complex emotions, especially if family relationships are fraught with tension.

Understanding the roots of this guilt is important for processing these feelings and moving forward.

OP's Mom Squandered a Lottery Win

Reddit/aiden_20

She Could Tell OP Was Lying

Reddit/aiden_20

OP Has Offered the Following Explanation for Why They Think They Might Be the AH:

I was raised to never lie to my parents about anything. I believe that having life-changing money should be shared and celebrated, but I feel like such a bad person for keeping it a secret. It's eating me up every time I look at my mother, and I need some reassurance that it's okay for me to have made the decision I've made.

And the Comments Roll In...

Reddit/aiden_20

The OP Doesn't Have the Money

Reddit/aiden_20

Psychologists note that guilt can serve as a barrier to making sound financial decisions, leading individuals to act against their best interests.

Studies indicate that individuals often feel obligated to share or justify their inheritance, which can complicate personal financial planning.

Recognizing this obligation can help individuals navigate their emotions more effectively.

You Have to Give Me Money

Reddit/aiden_20

First Red Flag

Reddit/aiden_20

The OP Left More Details in the Comments

I didn't mention that the inheritance is split between my dad and me—and my dad is a bigger enabler than I am (which is how I grew up not knowing how to say no, lol). So, I think if I didn't lie and told her my dad and I got the money, my dad would end up being the victim. She would get herself into a lot of trouble and play mental gymnastics to get us to help. Or... bring trouble over to the house we live in.

It Makes Sense

Reddit/aiden_20

Creating a New Account

Reddit/aiden_20

Developing a Healthy Relationship with Money

Establishing a healthy relationship with inherited money involves reframing one’s mindset around financial resources.

Therapists recommend that individuals explore their values and goals to align their financial decisions with personal beliefs.

This approach can reduce feelings of guilt and encourage more empowered decision-making.

There's No Sense

Reddit/aiden_20

The OP Doesn't Owe Her

Reddit/aiden_20

Additionally, working with a financial advisor can provide a practical framework for managing inherited wealth without succumbing to familial pressures.

Studies show that individuals who seek professional advice tend to make more informed and confident financial choices.

Creating a plan that reflects personal values can also help mitigate feelings of guilt.

Psychological Analysis

This dilemma illustrates the intricate relationship between family dynamics and financial decisions.

It's crucial to recognize that guilt can cloud judgment, and working through these emotions is essential for making empowered choices.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, addressing the guilt associated with inherited money requires a careful examination of personal values and family dynamics.

By fostering open communication and seeking professional guidance, individuals can navigate these complex feelings.

Developing a healthy relationship with money is key to moving forward without the burden of guilt.

Thanks to the comments, OP has realized that lying to their mom now is better than watching her misuse all the money. OP would be left with blame if they decided to be soft and generous, ultimately enabling their mom's behavior.

Besides, OP says they would be able to help her out a bit in the future if she's ever in a pinch. Overall, OP was declared not the AH.

The Role of Family Communication

Open communication with family members about money can alleviate some of the guilt surrounding inheritance.

Experts suggest that discussing expectations and boundaries can foster understanding and reduce tension.

This dialogue can create a more supportive environment where individuals feel comfortable making decisions without guilt.