Woman Asks If She Is In The Wrong For Wanting Her Grandmother To Attend Her International Wedding, But Doesn’t Want Any Responsibility Regarding Her Trip And Care

Destination weddings can look effortless in photos, but the planning behind them is usually anything but simple.

In this story, a woman wants her 81-year-old grandmother to attend an international wedding, but she also expects other relatives to handle the travel and care arrangements. That is where the family starts pushing back, and the whole plan gets messy fast.

Now she is left wondering whether wanting both things at once is fair, or just unrealistic. Read on.

OP asked:

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And then explained the situation:

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She and her boyfriend have big plans for their international wedding and want her grandma to attend.

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That is where the family started to split.

But some relatives weren't thrilled with the idea of taking care of the elderly lady.

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So now the family is split. OP asks if she is wrong for wanting it all...

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Some commenters pointed out that OP may not have considered whether her grandmother even wants to make such a long trip.

Some Redditors mentioned the fact that OP doesn't know if her grandma even wants to go on such a long trip.

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This is a good point. Is grandma a person or a fixture?

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This sounds about right.

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It is okay to want a dream wedding, but it's not okay to believe it is everyone's dream.

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Another relative seemed to be carrying most of the frustration.

Speaking of wedding drama, this is similar to the AITA where OP pushed back on a friend’s wedding venue choice.

The Vocal Aunt has spoken! She is probably the usual caregiver.

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And grandma is 81.

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Traveling long distances at that age may not be fun.

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Still, plenty of people understood why OP wanted the wedding to feel complete.

And dream weddings come in different forms...

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Some people made an effort...

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And had their dream wedding.

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Some people even bring weddings to their loved ones...

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The fact about destination weddings is that some people can't attend.

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Then the conversation turned to responsibility, and that changed everything.

There are simply too many variables...

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And OP needs to take on some responsibility.

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You can't expect people to take care of your grandma.

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But maybe if you pay them?

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OP posted an update, and it seems they've worked it out:

It is evident that OP cares a lot about having a wedding abroad and her grandmother’s presence. But given the grandma’s age, it is hard to combine both. So, some creative thinking is needed.

With some help from the Reddit community, OP and her family have found a viable solution. She will have her dream wedding and pay for a nurse to care for her grandmother.

It’s a win-win situation. We hope everything will work out and everyone will be happy.

For another family wedding flashpoint, see the debate over pushing a secret recipe at a sister’s wedding.