Wife Hides From Her Mother-In-Law And Pretends Not To Be Home

Some mother-in-law visits feel harmless, until they start showing up at the worst possible time. In this story, one new mother is already dealing with postpartum anxiety, and her mother-in-law keeps dropping by without warning, along with plenty of criticism and advice she never asked for.

After a long day, she ignored the doorbell and later lied to her husband, saying they were out for a walk with the baby. Now she feels guilty because her mother-in-law made a 20-minute bus ride to get there, but the tension in the house is clearly bigger than one missed visit.

Now everyone has an opinion on whether she crossed a line.

Here's what she posted on Reddit:

via: newmom_throwaway

Here's what happened when her mother-in-law came, and she pretended not to be home.

via: newmom_throwaway

That awkward moment set the tone for the whole situation.

Her husband noticed that she was lying, as their baby's stroller was in the corner along with the diaper bag in the same position it had been in when he left the previous day.

via: newmom_throwaway

And that made the lie a lot harder to keep up.

Here are some of the people's reactions to her post.

via: whateveryoubench

Stopping by without asking is rude.

via: retiredcoin

It's unacceptable for the mother-in-law to show up at their house without calling and confirming if they are okay with that, especially since she just gave birth.

via: TzarineJador

"No" is a complete sentence.

via: Maskydoo

The mother-in-law should know her boundaries. She should not be subjected to her mother-in-law's passive-aggressive comments.

via: heysiriwhatsmyname

The husband should have her back and talk to her.

via: silvertitan414

And if you thought hiding from a mother-in-law was bad, this mom’s fight over declining her mother-in-law’s baby shower hosting offer gets messy fast.

She needs to stand her ground and set firm boundaries. Otherwise, she will never find peace.

via: Catatomical

It's not her home, and it's not her mother-in-law's life! Her husband should handle that as soon as possible.

via: Hardhearted_

She should tell her husband that unless his mom asks to come over, she's not entertaining her.

via: thirdtryisthecharm

Being a grandparent is a privilege, not a right.

via: ScarletteMayWest

Her husband needs to establish the rules with her.

via: Boomgtd_

Her mother-in-law chose to spend 40 minutes on public transit on her own.

via: Striking_Description

She owes her mother-in-law nothing as she tries to set a perfectly reasonable boundary.

via: A-Purple-Lagoon

Showing up without notice is just rude.

via: SimplySam4210

She should tell her husband that she will continue to ignore her until she learns to call first.

via: Fun-Tourist-7395

That is an exercise in parenting.

via: TotallySusBlue1

Entertaining unwanted and annoying guests is not among her listed tasks.

via: No-Jellyfish-1208

Her husband should enforce these boundaries.

via: superfastmomma via: Buttercup303

This person can relate to OP's postpartum stress and even depression.

This person can relate to OP's postpartum stress and even depression.

via: Silvermystique13

Everyone in the family should understand that mothers may experience postpartum depression and anxiety. It can take weeks and may even worsen with various triggers.

The mother-in-law, who perhaps experienced this when she also gave birth, should be the first to understand that. It's never too hard to make a call first.

Was she wrong to put her foot down?

For more on refusing surprise MIL visits, see the AITA where she declined her mother-in-law’s unannounced stay.