Is it Fair to Give Some Children More Inheritance? Exploring a Will Dilemma

One Reddit post starts with a scan, a possible pancreatic cancer diagnosis, and a very real clock ticking in the background. While most people plan wills when life is stable, OP is doing it now, because the end of the story might be closer than anyone wants to admit.

OP has three children, two sons and a daughter, and the family math gets awkward fast. The daughter is child-free, the sons are fathers, and OP wants to split inheritance as 40/40/20, not just for their own kids, but also to keep grandchildren, and maybe future grandchildren, financially secure.

Then the question hits, and it is messy: is it fair, or is it favoritism dressed up as “security”?

Original Post

I might or might not being dying soon. I’ve had a scan that shows that I might have pancreatic cancer.

It’s that or another much much less frightening disease. So, I’m updating my will.

I have three children, two sons and a daughter. My daughter is child free, though I don’t exactly support her choice, I’m not against it in anyway.

My sons are both dads, and I think it’s fair that I give them more inheritance. It’s not going to be crazy more, but around 40/40/20.

They all get a decent amount of money, but I feel like that my grandchildren and possible future grandchildren should also be somewhat secure. So, AITA?

Comment from u/SincerelyCynical

Comment from u/LilLatte

Comment from u/fiveoclockmocktail

Comment from u/[deleted]

Comment from u/CouillesDeMammouth

Comment from u/[deleted]

Comment from u/tktsmnypssprt

Comment from u/docfarnsworth

Comment from u/deemigs

Similar to the argument where a party-loving brother caused wedding costs and got pushback, should OP demand he cover the wedding expenses he caused.

Comment from u/ALittleReyOfSunshine

Comment from u/[deleted]

Comment from u/ChidiAriana

Comment from u/RedditUser123234

Comment from u/[deleted]

Comment from u/[deleted]

Comment from u/tayfshockey

Comment from u/maggienetism

Comment from u/howdarebread

Comment from u/[deleted]

OP is staring at a possible cancer timeline, and suddenly the will update is the most stressful family conversation imaginable.

With the daughter getting 20 percent because she has no kids, the whole plan turns into a numbers problem that feels personal.

The sons being dads is the deciding factor for OP, but that is exactly what makes the inheritance split look loaded.

By the time OP asks “AITA?” it is no longer about money, it is about whether the grandkids should be the reason someone gets less.

We'd love to hear your take on this situation. Share your thoughts below.

This will is supposed to protect the family, but it might end up breaking it at dinner.

Before you decide, read how one sibling refused to share inheritance after caring for Mom.