Is it OK to Request Only Family Member Drop-Offs for Child Visits?

Some co-parenting arrangements run like clockwork, then one small change turns the whole routine into an awkward power struggle. In this Reddit thread, the handoffs are supposed to be simple, but a “quick drop-off” has quietly become a revolving door.

The OP, who lives alone with their child, says their co-parent regularly drops the kid off at their house. But for the past two years, the co-parent often brings an extra person who comes inside for 5 to 10 minutes during the exchange. There’s no romance involved, it could be a friend or any random family member, and OP is uncomfortable with third parties entering the home, even if they seem well-meaning.

Now OP is wondering if asking for drop-offs to be just the two of them makes them the bad guy.

Original Post

I have a family member who regularly drops my child off at my house. For the past two years, they’ve often brought an additional person who comes inside for 5–10 minutes during the handoff.

I live alone with my child and I don't generally have others over. I’m uncomfortable having third parties enter my home during exchanges, regardless of whether I know them.

WIBTA for asking that drop-offs be just between the two of us?

This is my co-parent dropping child off for our weekly exchanges.

The person they bring may be a friend, a random family member, anyone. It is not a romantic partner.

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This also echoes how OP defended their unconventional parenting style against family criticism at a heated dinner, Defending My Parenting: Am I Wrong for Embracing Unconventional Methods?

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The routine is already stressful for OP, since they’re home alone with their child and don’t usually have anyone else around during exchanges.

What makes it messier is that the extra guest is a total wildcard, could be anyone, and they still come inside for those 5 to 10 minutes.

OP’s co-parent is treating the third-party visits like no big deal, but the OP sees it as an unnecessary boundary break.

With two years of “sometimes someone else comes in,” OP is deciding whether to finally set the rule, and the comments are going to pick sides fast.

We're curious to hear your perspective. Share your thoughts in the comments.

OP just wants the door to stay closed during handoffs, and the co-parent situation might not survive that request.

Want another family standoff, read how OP refused to lend money to their brothers. Should I prioritize family over finances? AITA for refusing to lend money to my brothers struggling bakery?