20 Y.O. Turns To Reddit To Help Her Decide If She Should Fix Her Relationship With Her Mom

OP didn’t set out to blow up her relationship with her mom, she just wanted a normal life after moving out for college. Instead, she’s stuck in that awful limbo where you keep replaying every comment, every expectation, and every moment you felt smaller than you already were.

At home, it was pressure to get good grades, no matter what she actually delivered. She got into weightlifting and powerlifting, but her mom kept tossing out discouraging comments about her body. And when OP tried to open up, she wasn’t met with empathy, she was called a spoiled brat, even when she was showing up for meets like the one where her parents didn’t even bother to come.

Here’s the Reddit thread where OP tries to figure out if she should fix things, or finally stop chasing approval.

OP has come to the conclusion that she no longer loves her mom

u/throwaway1024818

OP was always under pressure to get good grades, but she never delivered on her mom's expectations

u/throwaway1024818

OP is into weightlifting, but her mom is always making discouraging comments about it

u/throwaway1024818

OP’s mom didn’t just miss the powerlifting meet, she made sure OP felt like she was the problem for wanting to be seen.

The complexities of mother-daughter relationships are vividly illustrated in the story of OP, who finds herself at a crossroads after moving out for college. The article delves into the emotional conflicts that often arise when expectations clash with reality, a theme that resonates deeply in OP's situation. This insight can empower individuals like OP to critically assess their familial connections and make informed decisions about their futures.

The comments OP received from her mom about her body have caused many insecurities

u/throwaway1024818

OP attended a powerlifting meet, but her parents weren't there to watch her

u/throwaway1024818

OP can't open up to her mom without being called a spoiled brat

u/throwaway1024818

Between the grading pressure and the body comments, OP’s “spoiled brat” label starts to sound less like a one-off and more like a pattern.

This underscores the importance of addressing these issues constructively and openly.

Recognizing patterns can help individuals decide whether to pursue reconciliation or establish boundaries.

This is similar to the art school showdown, where a parent-pressured family clashed with the person’s passion.

OP is stuck at a crossroads with limited options

u/throwaway1024818

Time for therapy

u/_annie_bird

Living the life you want to live

u/hoon-since89

That’s when OP has to decide whether cutting off the constant criticism is “fixing the relationship” or just protecting herself.

Assessing the Relationship

Asking oneself reflective questions about the relationship’s impact on emotional well-being can provide clarity.

This process can help individuals make informed decisions about the path forward.

Relationships never stop changing

u/dman4fun2020

Setting some boundaries

u/GuyD427

Emotionally abusive mom

u/Principesza

Now OP is weighing her options, whether it’s setting boundaries or walking away for good, one Reddit comment at a time.

When individuals identify what specifically bothers them, they can approach conversations with their parents more constructively.

Therapeutic intervention can also provide tools for managing these interactions.

Many of us navigate the complex terrain of family dynamics, seeking understanding, closure, or perhaps a path to rediscovery.

As we contemplate OP's dilemma, let's reflect on our relationships and the ways we navigate the bumpy road of familial connections. Sometimes, the most profound journeys begin with a single step – and in OP's case, that step might be towards self-discovery and healing, whatever form it takes.

When to Consider Distance

Sometimes, creating distance is necessary for emotional health.

It’s essential to recognize that distance can be a form of self-care, allowing individuals to focus on their own growth.

The relationship between a mother and daughter often unfolds in layers of complexity and emotion.

The family dinner might be over, but OP is still deciding whether her mom gets a seat at her future.

For more family tension, read how one sister was confronted over mom’s medical bills.