Woman Doesn't Want Her Boyfriend Around Her Newborn Baby If He's Going To Smoke

We're back here again with yet another Reddit post that we're going to be looking into, and this one is from the AITA thread. This thread is the perfect place to go if you're looking to get an opinion on whether or not you are in the wrong for something you said or did.

With that being said, we are going to look at a post today that was submitted by a woman who wants to know if she's in the wrong for telling her boyfriend that she doesn't want him around their baby if he's going to be smoking marijuana. She talked about her concerns in the post, and I think most of us definitely understand her worries.

However, it sounds like the man doesn't really see an issue with it and seems to think that it'll be okay. OP really just wants to know if she's in the wrong for expecting him not to be around their baby if he's high or smoking.

If you're interested in looking at the full post and seeing what everyone had to say in the comments, then keep on reading as we dive in and give you a full look into the situation and what people told OP about her circumstances.

1. OP's post was pretty short and straightforward but basically talked about her concerns with having a baby soon.

2. This is when she goes into detail about what he wants to do and how she's just not okay with that at all.

Understanding Maternal Concerns

Research shows that maternal instincts are often heightened during the postpartum period, a time when mothers are particularly sensitive to perceived threats to their newborns' safety.

According to a study published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, mothers may experience increased anxiety and protective instincts due to hormonal changes and the instinctual drive to nurture.

This can lead to strong feelings regarding potential risks, such as exposure to smoke, which is known to have harmful effects on infants.

3. People immediately told OP that she's NTA here and that her concerns are totally valid.

Apart-Ad-6518

4. Right, because it's unreasonable not to be concerned about smoking around your newborn baby.

KaliTheBlaze

From a behavioral perspective, this situation highlights the complexities of relational dynamics when parenting.

When a mother feels that her child’s health is at stake, it can trigger a fight-or-flight response, impacting her emotional state and decision-making abilities.

The psychological implications of such stress can lead to feelings of isolation or resentment towards partners who do not align with her protective instincts.

5. This is absolutely a reasonable boundary to set, and we're not sure why her boyfriend doesn't really understand that.

Equivalent-Board206

6. This is actually pretty funny, but either way, it's not okay.

Reddit

The Importance of Communication

Effective communication is crucial in navigating the challenges of parenting together, especially when differing views on health and safety arise.

Studies highlight that couples who engage in active listening and express their fears openly tend to have more harmonious parenting experiences.

Building a shared understanding can involve setting clear boundaries and discussing the implications of behaviors such as smoking around the child.

7. I wouldn't want him around either because clearly he has no regard for the well-being of that baby, and that's a huge red flag.

AppletjeEitje1079

8. Yep, he absolutely needs to grow up, and he really needs to understand why this is dangerous.

Odd-Elderberry-6137

Practical solutions include establishing a smoke-free environment and seeking counseling to address underlying tensions. According to Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a relationship therapist, "Couples therapy can provide a safe space for partners to explore their concerns and develop effective communication strategies." Creating a united front not only benefits the couple’s relationship but also fosters a healthier environment for the child, as emphasized by Dr. Solomon, who states, "When parents work together, they model cooperation and respect for their children."

9. She's not being overprotective at all here; she's really just being a smart mother who is putting her baby first.

dundersnus

10. Secondhand smoke is very harmful, and clearly he just doesn't understand the seriousness behind this.

Threebeeseach

People had so much to say here in the comments section about this situation, and that OP was really not in the wrong here, but that the boyfriend definitely is. We don't think he should be doing that around the baby at all, and it's kind of weird that he doesn't find that concerning.

11. It totally is normal for smokers to understand boundaries, but clearly this guy just doesn't understand boundaries at all.

hikerpunk42

12. Some people actually said that there was NAH because they thought that being high isn't necessarily wrong around the baby.

KiyokoTakashiMasaru

Behavioral Insights into Protective Instincts

Psychological studies reveal that protective behaviors often stem from deep-seated fears regarding attachment and loss.

Dr. Mary Main’s research on attachment theory emphasizes that a mother's perception of threats can be influenced by her own attachment history, affecting her actions toward her partner.

This can create a cycle where the mother’s anxiety about her partner's behavior leads to increased conflict, which in turn heightens her feelings of threat.

13. People definitely had a lot of things to say here, and actually most of them think that OP was NTA but that her boyfriend is.

KarateandPopTarts

Psychological Analysis

This situation illustrates a common theme in parental relationships, where protective instincts can lead to heightened emotional responses.

From our perspective, it’s crucial for both partners to navigate these feelings collaboratively, ensuring that both the child's health and the couple's relationship are prioritized.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In summary, the psychological factors at play in this scenario are compounded by maternal instinct, communication issues, and relational dynamics.

Research from the Journal of Family Psychology indicates that addressing these concerns through open dialogue and understanding can significantly improve relationship quality.

Ultimately, prioritizing the health and well-being of the child should be the common goal that unites both partners in their parenting journey.