Artist Explains Why She Needs To Charge Money For Painting Niece's Bible; Entitled Stepmom Insists On Free Work

A prevalent issue within the Christian community is the presence of hypocrisy among many of its members. Many of them simply don't walk the talk.

Whether among church leaders or regular attendees, instances of hypocrisy are unfortunately common. You can see this attitude even among Christian family members.

A Redditor who shared her story with the "Am I The A**hole?" (AITA) community encountered this hypocrisy when some of her family members discovered that she paints Bibles and books. The original poster (OP) runs a small business on Etsy using her creative skills.

Her teenage niece expressed interest in having her Bible painted after seeing the Redditor's work on Facebook. When the Redditor explained that her painted Bibles are part of her small business and not free, the niece's stepmother accused the OP of trying to scam the teen.

Despite the OP's explanation of the time and cost involved in her work, the stepmom accused her of being greedy and lacking Christian values. The stepmom's reaction sparked quite a family drama, with the story spreading among family members.

The Redditor feels torn between familial obligations and maintaining her small business. While she understands her niece's desire for a painted Bible, the OP also believes in the importance of valuing her time and skills.

The OP wonders if telling her niece that painting Bibles costs money makes her an a-hole.

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The OP explains that painting Bibles is her side job. The handiwork requires time and money to buy the supplies.

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Her niece saw her projects and wanted her Bible painted by the OP.

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The Value of Artistic Work

Dr. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, a psychologist renowned for his research on creativity, emphasizes the intrinsic value of artistic expression. He suggests that artists often pour their heart and soul into their work, and this investment deserves recognition and compensation.

When someone undervalues creative work, it can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration for the artist, highlighting the importance of establishing fair expectations in creative collaborations.

The OP explained that painting Bibles can't be done easily. She needs to buy supplies and spend time working on the project.

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The OP was then confronted by her SIL, her niece's stepmom, asking why she's attempting to scam the teenager.

The stepmom insisted that she needs to do it for free because that's what Christians do.

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The OP stood her ground and explained that projects like that can't easily be done for free.

Eventually, her SIL started drama within the family by posting on Facebook and telling family members about what the OP did.

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Additionally, social psychology research shows that perceptions of entitlement can significantly affect interpersonal dynamics. A study published in the Journal of Social Issues indicates that when people feel entitled to something without recognizing the effort involved, it can lead to conflict and dissatisfaction.

This entitlement mentality can undermine relationships, particularly when one party feels that their contributions are not being valued.

The OP feels that with all the work it takes to paint a Bible, it can't be easily done for free, even if a family member is asking.

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The OP even offered a compromise by providing it for free on special occasions.

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That would have been the perfect clapback for the hypocritical SIL.

If only the OP had seen this line before her SIL confronted her and asked her to paint for free.

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Establishing Fair Expectations

To navigate situations like this, it's essential to set clear expectations regarding creative work from the outset. Dr. Brené Brown, a researcher on vulnerability and shame, suggests that open communication about contributions can prevent misunderstandings and foster trust.

Having a candid discussion about the value of the work and the artist's need for fair compensation can help both parties come to a mutual understanding, preventing future conflicts.

Some people think they can weaponize being a Christian. It's very manipulative and exploitative of her SIL.

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Refusing to work for free doesn't make one a bad Christian.

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Unfortunately, it seems that the niece is becoming an entitled person.

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Furthermore, artists can benefit from learning to advocate for themselves and their work. Research indicates that individuals who confidently assert their needs and boundaries are often more satisfied in their relationships and professional endeavors. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology highlights that self-advocacy can lead to better outcomes in negotiations and collaborations.

By being clear about their expectations and the value of their work, artists can cultivate healthier professional relationships.

The OP taught her niece an important life lesson by explaining that painted Bibles aren't something she can easily provide for free. Even though she's young, it's crucial for her to understand that work requiring supplies and time must be compensated fairly.

The OP has already offered a fair compromise, and the niece only needs to be patient. Unfortunately, the stepmom isn't setting a good example for the OP's niece.

If the teenager continues to witness her mom's sense of entitlement, it's only a matter of time before she becomes entitled herself.

Psychological Analysis

This situation reflects the common challenge of navigating expectations in creative partnerships. It's crucial for artists to feel valued and fairly compensated for their work, as this recognition can significantly impact their motivation and satisfaction. Open discussions about value can foster healthier relationships in creative fields.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Understanding the value of artistic contributions is essential for nurturing healthy professional relationships. Research supports the importance of establishing fair expectations and recognizing the efforts involved in creative work.

Ultimately, clear communication and self-advocacy can lead to more fulfilling collaborations and reduce feelings of resentment.