A Redditor Revealed The Custody Evaluation For His Kids To His Ex's Family After Being Accused Of Depriving Visitations
"I gave them the report to read and told them to get off my property. They read it."
A custody fight can turn a messy breakup into a full family showdown, and that is exactly what happened here.
After divorcing his ex for cheating, a Redditor spent years dealing with an uneven custody arrangement for their 9-year-old twins. He says she rarely kept the agreed schedule, he documented the missed time, and eventually he pushed for physical custody and won. Once the court-ordered schedule tightened up, her family started accusing him of blocking visitations.
That is when he pulled out the custody evaluation and let the fallout begin.
Here's the post of OP about his ex
DecisionTurbulent183OP recounted how he ended up filing for divorce
DecisionTurbulent183
DecisionTurbulent183
The proceedings after the divorce instantly got off to a rocky start
DecisionTurbulent183
DecisionTurbulent183
OP gave his ex more chances to improve, but she continued to abuse them
DecisionTurbulent183
DecisionTurbulent183
They saw how OP only did what he had to and ensured the kids would be protected
DecisionTurbulent183
DecisionTurbulent183
He does not prevent contact if they show that they care for the kids
DecisionTurbulent183
OP always had to reconsider their plans since the time the kids spent with his ex was very unpredictable. He finally sought physical custody after a year of this situation and won.
His ex tried to prolong the custody evaluation and trial, but it ultimately did not work in her favor due to her lawyer not having much to work with. Now she needs to adhere to a detailed schedule, and after abusing OP’s flexibility with it, OP had her follow it precisely.
OP’s ex’s parents and siblings showed up at his door, accusing him of denying visitations. OP had them read the evaluation by the custody evaluator and asked them to leave.
The ex’s parents apologized, and soon a call came from none other than the ex herself. She screamed at him for exposing her lies and revealing what was supposed to be a private matter. Her brother understood what OP showed and somewhat apologized, but her sister still viewed him as the a**hole until he informed her that the kids were in therapy due to the neglect.
This is similar to the question of whether OP is wrong for pushing for a better divorce lawyer for an ex-husband with financial struggles.
Here’s a little insight on what kind of privacy might entail in cases like OP’s
cyberllama
It all depends on what was legally agreed upon, and there are many things that can’t be disclosed to the 'public'
cebolinha50
However, there could also be a case where it isn’t, and you can use it as OP did
sigharewedoneyet
If OP’s ex fed them so many lies that they became angry enough to show up at his door, then revealing the report might be the only way they would believe him
DannyBigD
She wouldn’t get to solely decide what’s private and what’s not
TeepShow76
The ex thought she would get everyone on her side, but it backfired
mamabear421
OP’s ex could’ve simply kept quiet, and none of this would have been exposed
BendingCollegeGrad
NTA vote for OP being the best parent he can be for his kids
Key_Pick_1022
He probably knows his ex well enough to have documented the neglect as it happened
hello_friendss
And slowly, you see their faces fall as the puzzle pieces come together
saveyboy
The fact that OP tried to be flexible with the schedule as long as the kids were involved says a lot, and fortunately, his consideration extended to the grandparents
nicethingsarenicer
A continuation of the comment
nicethingsarenicer
A Redditor who was also a family lawyer offered some advice, as the topic of privacy differs by state
cuntakinte118
An inquiry if OP had any knowledge of whether he could share the reports (cont.)
cuntakinte118
In the end, even without OP’s definitive answer on whether the files were private or not, his utmost care for his kids was evident to Redditors
XANDERtheSHEEPDOG
There was a mess of lies and deception from OP’s ex, which ultimately affected her rights concerning her children. This was clearly seen by her family as well, and it was a good thing that OP still chose to give chances to those who wanted to love his children.
OP is a parent who wants the best for his kids, and hopefully, that will continue without much hindrance. They are kids who didn’t ask for any of the drama to happen to them.
Do you think OP’s ex will see the error of her ways? Let us know your thoughts in the comments.
Wait until you see how his kids reacted after he found his wife’s secret savings and got divorced.