Should I Attend A Wedding Without Bringing A Gift?
Would you bring a gift to a wedding where the couple is remarrying each other? Find out Reddit's take on the etiquette surrounding this unique situation.
A cousin’s daughter is remarrying the ex-husband she divorced years ago, and the whole family is trying to act normal about it. The relationship drama is apparently resolved, the couple is back on track, and now they’re hosting a second wedding ceremony and reception like nothing happened.
Here’s the messy part, though: this remarrying situation means they already have a mountain of wedding stuff from the first go-around. They bought what they needed while they were married, so many items are duplicates now. Meanwhile, family members are wondering if showing up without a gift is rude, or if it’s just one more way to keep the peace.
OP’s RSVP decision is about to stir up the kind of family math people hate.
Original Post
My cousin’s daughter is remarrying her ex-husband. They have worked out their differences after their divorce and want to give it another try.
That’s great! However, they are having another wedding ceremony and reception.
They received a lot of what a new couple needs and bought whatever else they required while they were married. Having been divorced for a few years, they now have duplicates of many items.
WIBTA if I attended but did not bring a gift?
Social norms around gift-giving at weddings can often lead to confusion and discomfort.
Comment from u/Majestic_Shoe5175
Comment from u/EvilSockLady
OP isn’t just debating “gift or no gift,” they’re doing it while picturing the duplicates their cousin’s daughter and her ex already have from the first wedding.
Yet, when the couple is remarrying, the dynamics shift, and individuals may question the appropriateness of their contributions.
Comment from u/Stranger0nReddit
Comment from u/dirty_bunny_57
The comments start side-eyeing the remarrying part, because some people feel a second ceremony changes the rules, even if the couple insists they’re starting fresh.
It’s like the AITA fight where a sibling asked to pay more for vacation expenses.
Should I Ask My Brother to Pay More for Vacation Expenses? | AITAWhen in doubt, communication with the couple can be an effective strategy.
This approach fosters an open dialogue and can enhance the emotional connection among all parties involved.
Comment from u/LLD615
Comment from u/Lizdance40
OP’s hesitation gets louder when you remember they’re not a brand-new couple, they’re the same pair reconciling, with already-stocked drawers and extra “just in case” kitchen items.
What are your thoughts on this situation? Share your perspective in the comments below.
Comment from u/BunnySlayer64
Comment from u/Wild_Ticket1413
Comment from u/KaetzenOrkester
That’s why the thread keeps circling back to the same move, talk to the cousin’s daughter before OP risks turning a reunion celebration into a gift debate.
In the intricate landscape of social etiquette surrounding weddings, the decision to attend without a gift raises important questions. Attending a second wedding ceremony, especially one marked by reconciliation, invites us to reflect on our values and relationships. It is essential to consider the significance of the event and the feelings of those involved. Engaging in open dialogue with the couple can provide clarity and ensure that one's choices align with personal beliefs and the nuances of familial expectations. This self-awareness is crucial in making a decision that feels both respectful and authentic.
OP might end up feeling like the bad guy for showing up, even if the couple already has everything.
Want more family conflict over money and boundaries? Read how one woman kept an inherited home from her parents.
Family Feud: AITA for Keeping Inherited Home Against Parents Wishes?
