Should I Feel Guilty for Moving Out After Son Buys Us a House?

Some people treat “help” like a forever contract, and this Reddit post is proof. OP and her partner have been renting in a friend’s home for five years, always paying on time, always keeping things in decent shape. Then grief hit, moving plans got derailed, and suddenly the friend’s big financial timeline got bent out of shape.

Here’s the twist: OP’s son bought them a house to lock in their retirement security and slash their monthly costs. It’s a sweet gesture, honestly, and OP is genuinely relieved at the idea of only paying utilities. But now OP has to tell the original friend that they’re leaving after all, just six months after saying they would stay, right when he’s already stressed from remortgaging and putting another property through the wringer.

The guilt is real, but the math and the emotions are both messy, and the timing is brutal.

Original Post

We have been renting my friends house for the last five years approximately . In the summer last year we gave notice to move and my Friend and their partner were disappointed as they had been in the process or remortgaging it.

It’s their retirement nest egg. We pay the going rate.

Always on time. My partner and I had a significant bereavement and we changed my mind about moving.

I could barely leave the house let alone move and at that point I couldn’t imagine moving at all. My Friend and his partner were super pleased and relieved we decided to stay because they didn’t want to sell yet and didn’t want any more tenants because the ones they had before us cost them a fortune in unpaid rent and damage to the property.

Our son has now bought a house for us because he wants us to be house secure and lower our costs to enjoy retirement. It is such a wonderful gesture.

He is a wonderful young man.. Here’s where I wonder AITA?

My Friend has remortgaged his investment and we now have to tell him that we are leaving after all. He has another property he has had to put on the market and was really stressed and unhappy about the redecorating of the property and the whole process and I am anticipating he won’t be impressed when I tell him we will be moving only 6 months after we told him we would be staying.

AITA? I’ll be honest the prospect of the actual logistics of the move fills me with dread but the financial freedom of only paying utility bills will be life changing.

AITA

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This is similar to the Thanksgiving standoff, where someone refused to host during a family feud.

Family Feud: AITA for Refusing to Host Thanksgiving Amid Ongoing Conflict?

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OP’s friend and his partner were already disappointed once, back when OP and her partner gave notice and then stayed because grief made moving feel impossible.

That “stay” decision was a huge relief for them, since they didn’t want to sell and they were still burned from past tenants who cost them money and damage.

Now OP’s son has swooped in with a house purchase for retirement stability, which means OP has to reverse course and tell the friend they’ll be moving again.

And the friend is not just any landlord, he remortgaged the investment and is already stressed about redecorating another property he had to list.

We're curious to hear your perspective. Share your thoughts in the comments.

OP might be trying to do the right thing, but six months after promising to stay, the guilt is hitting hardest.

Don’t miss this one, where a woman refused to split her mom’s jewelry.

Should I Keep My Mothers Jewelry or Split It Among Siblings?