Should I Have Lent My SIL My Designer Bag for Her Wedding?

AITA for not lending my SIL my designer bag for a wedding, even though she's helped me with sales, and I fear it might get damaged in her care?

Damjan

Published in Interesting
25 Dec 2025

Should I Have Lent My SIL My Designer Bag for Her Wedding?

In today's Reddit thread, we dive into a common dilemma many can relate to: lending expensive belongings to family members. The original poster (OP) is faced with a request from their sister-in-law to borrow an $800 YSL clutch for a wedding, a situation that has sparked significant discussion about trust, responsibility, and the complexities of familial relationships.

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On one hand, OP grapples with feelings of anxiety about potential damage to their designer bag, despite acknowledging that the sister-in-law owns her own collection of designer pieces. This raises an interesting point: Is it reasonable to assume someone will treat your belongings with the same care they give their own?

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The tension in OP's situation is compounded by the sister-in-law's help in reselling OP's Labubu collection, leading OP to question whether refusing the request would make them appear ungrateful or inconsiderate. As comments roll in, opinions vary.

Some users argue that lending the bag could strengthen their relationship, while others emphasize that OP is under no obligation to lend out valuable items. This thread invites us to consider the balance between generosity and self-preservation, making it a rich topic for discussion.

What would you do in OP’s shoes?

Original Post

Sister in law asked if she could borrow my $800 YSL clutch for a wedding because it matches her dress. I feel pretty anxious because I’m afraid it’ll be damaged, but she also has designer bags of her own so I think she knows the value of it enough to take care of it.

But if I had said no, would IBTA? She has been helping me resale my Labubu collection to her coworkers and helping my make a small profit from it and I thought IWBTA if I didn’t let her borrow my bag.