Lady Chooses To Save One Sister's Life Over The Other, Gets Accused Of Favoritism By Family

Each year, kidney transplants help thousands of individuals avoid death. Living and deceased donors can both donate their kidneys for transplant.

Many kidney patients are still alive today, all thanks to living donors or people who donate one of their two kidneys. Because of this kind gesture, very few people pass away in situations where they can be organ donors.

You might know this, but many transplants were made feasible by living donors. Although many surviving donors are members of the recipients' families or close friends, it is increasingly common for people to volunteer to give their kidneys to strangers.

Similar to how numerous individuals donate blood every year, living kidney donors are motivated to improve the lives of others. The OP in today's story wants to donate her kidney to one of her identical twin half-sisters, but the family has a problem with the one she chose.

The twins have both sadly reached a point where, without a kidney transplant, their quality of life will continue to decline, and they might not see the other side of 20. One of the OP's half-sisters is very much like a tomboy, just like herself.

They are really close and enjoy a lot of the same things, so she chose to give her kidney to her, but her family says she's showing favoritism. 

The headline

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It wasn't expected that the twins would be in this position so young

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They were equally close until Jade started doing her own thing and making choices for herself

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The Psychology of Favoritism

Favoritism within families can lead to profound emotional repercussions, particularly for the child who feels overlooked.

Research indicates that perceived favoritism can contribute to sibling rivalry, decreased self-esteem, and long-term relationship issues.

Understanding these dynamics can help families address underlying issues and promote healthier interactions.

Navigating Family Dynamics

Family dynamics can be incredibly complex, especially when life-and-death decisions arise unexpectedly. Research in family psychology shows that such situations often exacerbate pre-existing tensions and unresolved conflicts. In this case, the decision to save one sister over the other is likely to evoke feelings of guilt, anxiety, and anger within the family.

Understanding the psychological impact of such decisions is crucial, as family members may react based on their past experiences and relationships, leading to further discord.

The OP has been getting calls and texts from everyone who knows about her decision

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The OP had to further add more details as it seems the initial story was cut short by character limitations

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The OP is choosing Sarah because she wants to save her life

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A developmental psychologist notes that making life-and-death decisions can exacerbate existing family tensions, especially when siblings feel they are not equally valued.

This situation can trigger feelings of guilt and resentment, which often necessitate therapeutic intervention to resolve.

Conflict resolution strategies can be beneficial in addressing these complex emotional landscapes.

Cognitive dissonance theory, proposed by Leon Festinger, suggests that individuals experience discomfort when their beliefs and actions conflict. The woman in this scenario may feel torn between her love for both sisters and the harsh reality of making a life-altering decision. This internal conflict can lead to significant emotional stress and a sense of isolation.

Recognizing and addressing these feelings can be the first step in processing the situation and finding a path forward.

All this is not just enough to make the OP change how she feels

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And the comments from other Redditors roll in...

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Being a donor is a noble cause no matter who the kidney goes to

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Ethical Considerations in Family Decisions

Families facing life-altering choices often grapple with ethical dilemmas that can strain relationships.

According to research published in the Journal of Family Psychology, decision-making in high-stakes situations requires a balance of rational thinking and emotional sensitivity.

Creating a family discussion framework can facilitate more collaborative decision-making, reducing feelings of isolation or unfairness.

Support Systems in Crisis

During crises, having a strong support system can be invaluable. Research shows that individuals who lean on supportive relationships during stressful times tend to cope better with emotional turmoil. The woman should consider reaching out to trusted friends or a therapist to discuss her feelings about the decision and its implications.

Engaging in professional counseling can provide a safe space to explore her emotions and receive guidance on how to navigate family tensions, helping her to process guilt and grief.

This Redditor does not see a problem with choosing one of the twins

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Do they really expect the OP to give up her two kidneys?

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The chances of the OP's sisters declining at exactly the same rate

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Therapists recommend establishing clear communication channels where family members can express their feelings and concerns openly.

Utilizing structured family meetings can foster a sense of unity and shared responsibility, especially in difficult situations.

It's also vital to validate each member's feelings, ensuring that everyone feels heard and considered, which can reduce tensions significantly.

Furthermore, communication strategies within families can help mitigate tensions during high-stress situations. Studies indicate that expressing feelings openly can promote understanding and healing. The woman might benefit from initiating family discussions where everyone can voice their thoughts and emotions, creating a more inclusive decision-making process.

This can foster a sense of unity rather than division, helping family members feel heard and valued despite the difficult circumstances.

The OP added this as an edit:

To the people who pointed out that complete kidney failure isn't necessarily a death sentence, thank you for the hope you are giving me. I knew they would be able to get dialysis; I had no idea it was a long-term solution, so thank you for reaching out.

It wouldn't be fair to give the kidney to one sister

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This Redditor wants to know why another family member can't do an exchange

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The other sister would still be on the list

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The Role of Grief and Loss

Grief is a complex emotional response that can manifest in various ways, often complicating decision-making in crisis situations. Research in grief psychology indicates that individuals process loss differently, and feelings of guilt can be a common reaction. The woman may experience anticipatory grief as she contemplates the potential loss of one sister over the other.

Understanding these grief responses can be essential for her own emotional healing and may assist in navigating the reactions of other family members.

The OP could turn it around and ask why the other twin deserves to die, and if they don't, they love her enough to want to save her. It is really a horrible position to be in, and Redditors hope that the OP's family gets a miracle and another kidney donor comes along.

The OP was declared not the AH.

Psychological Analysis

This scenario highlights the challenges individuals face when forced to make profound decisions under pressure. It's common for emotions to run high, leading to conflict and misunderstanding among family members.

Encouraging open dialogue and seeking professional support can help families address their feelings and work towards healing amidst such difficult circumstances.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Family dynamics often face unprecedented challenges during times of crisis. Research emphasizes the importance of communication, support systems, and understanding emotional responses to foster healing.

By approaching the situation with empathy and openness, families can navigate through the complexities of loss and decision-making together.

Psychological Analysis

In this scenario, the conflict seems rooted in deep emotional ties and the pressures of life-altering decisions. It's essential for families to acknowledge these emotional complexities and work towards equitable solutions that honor each member's feelings.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Understanding the psychological impacts of favoritism can pave the way for healthier family dynamics.

As research indicates, acknowledging and addressing these issues is crucial for fostering emotional well-being in families.